Mom: I saw John Cena at WWE.
Son: No way, you can’t see him though.
Mom: God!
Son: What?
Mom: You watch too much reality TV (comes to smack butt).
Son: Also because I’m John Cena.
Mom: Where, where’d ya go?
John Cena: Hey, Mom.
Mom: I’m only 31, you’re 42.
I'mma monch ur nan's feet at 3 am tonight, ngl.
Everyone is a gangster until Helen Keller hits a 3 on you.
What do you call a sad Doge?
What?
Nothing but Sarrrooooddd!
Chuck Norris once put a plastic bag on his head, and the bag suffocated to death.
What is the similarity between an anti-joke and a clown? Neither are funny.
"What's 9 + 10?"
"21" (lol XD)
Also:
"My name Jeff" (Roar XD)
One more thing:
Ninja has ligma.
"and i oop"
If museums are full of dead things...
Then why aren't there any memes inside them?
Me: *makes Chuck Norris meme*
Internet: *all the other memes are dead now*
Me: Well, shit.
(Credit to Meme Machine)
What's the similarity between a 14-year-old girl and the fetus inside her? They're both thinking, "Oh fuck, mom is gonna kill me!"
Gamemaster10
Stormtrooper: What should we do with this coffee?
Palpatine: Brew it!
Jesus created the T-pose first.
Crucifixion was the first T-pose.
Baby > commits start breathing.
Mom > commits abort.
Baby > commits ohshit.exe
Deez nuts!
GOT EEMMMMMMMM!
Lightning doesn’t strike twice in the same place, but Chuck Norris does.
What do Doges like? Memes.
My memes are ironic, but my depression is chronic.
