The 20+ Best Mechanism Jokes

To all you who can't understand using jokes as coping mechanism... you know what i will ask of you:)

I bought a gun from Walmart today. I guess they knew what I was going to do with it, because when I pulled the gun on the cashier, I realized the firing mechanism was in reverse.

What do you call a guy whose hand is up a horse's butt?

An Amish Mechanic.

Why are most absent dads mechanics

They like to nut and bolt

What does a lesbian have in common with a mechanic? Snap-on tools

My grandpa personally killed 3 German pilots. He was the worst mechanic Luftwaffe had.

I asked my kid to give me a hand that motherfucker cried while charging his mechanical arm

My dad may be working, but the coping mechanisms sure aren't

Why does a robot malfunction when they get said? Becuase they have a break down

Police officers hope you’re a criminal. Doctors hope you get sick. Mechanics hope you get car troubles. But only thieves wish you prosperity. Weird?

As he threw the mechanical pencil toward me, I knew that if I didn't move, I would be lead into serious trouble.

What does a robot do after a one night stand? He nuts n bolts

WHY IS THE MOON RED TODAY?The reason why the Moon takes on a reddish color during totality is a phenomenon called Rayleigh scattering. It is the same mechanism responsible for causing colorful sunrises and sunsets, and for the sky to look blue.

My sister got in a car crash a couple days ago. When she got to the hospital, the doctor told her that she needed to get metal mechanics in her leg. She got really scared and yelled at the doctor telling them that, “I will not get those implanted in my leg.” I guess she just doesn’t associate with knee gears.

Why don't wheelchairs have pedals, so when their arms get tired they can keep going with their feet?

What did the mechanic say to the other mechanic when he broke the car? "How will we wrench ourselves out of this?"

My Grandpa Killed 30 Air-Force Pilots in WW2. He was a very bad mechanic.

A group of Astronauts, a Mechanic, a Pilot & a Communications operator are on a very important mission to Mars when one of their solar panels gets grazed by a meteorite. And so the Astronauts quickly assemble in the hull to the they get orders from the ground. Once the Communications operator turned on coms, their man on the ground told the Pilot to continue their course & to send the Mechanic out to fix the problem. As the Mechanic worked on finishing repairing the solar panel, the Pilot & Communications operator told each other dark jokes when out of nowhere a meteorite field appeared! The Ground operator frighteningly shouted "Get him back in the ship!" to the Communications operator. "Chill out, he'll be fine." The Pilot assured him. "Get him the hell out of there, that's an order!" The Ground operator argued. Then thirty seconds later the Communications operator came back from the air shoot & asked "Now what?"