Matter jokes
Life is all that matters.
What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call him, he's not coming.
I set fiya to the rain! Wait, no, that ain't possible, what... I evaporated the rain!
Don't trust atoms, they make up everything!
Do not trust atoms! They make up everything.
What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter?
An irrel-elephant ;)
Atoms are untrustworthy little critters. They make everything up!
Never trust an atom; they make up everything.
What's large, grey, and doesn't matter?
An irrelephant.
Never trust a Justin, he is made up of atoms that make up everything.
I don't trust atoms. They always make stuff up.
Don't trust atoms, they make up everything.
North Korea and the Martians were fighting about who was going to reach Venus first.
Trump steps in and says, "That doesn't matter, America is going to land on the sun first."
The Martians and North Korea said, "You can't land on the sun, it's too hot and you will die."
Trump said his brilliant plan, "America is going to land there at night."
Why did the chicken cross the road?
It doesn't matter, he's dead.
Why are there so many jokes about Chuck Norris, but not about Bruce Lee?
Bruce Lee was no joking matter.
What do you call a dog with no legs? -- Doesn't matter what you call him, he's not coming.
No matter how kind you are, German children are kinder.
I don't trust atoms.
They make up everything.
No matter how much I love cake...
I would never dessert you.