Marine biology jokes
A fully grown bull Great White Shark is 15 feet long and can open its jaws up to 1.2 meters long. It could eat a small child in seconds. Anyways, I lost my job at the aquarium...
What are fish not allowed to have?
Seaweed.
What is a shark’s favorite TV show? Sea-S-I.
Where does the killer whale go to get its teeth done?
The orca Don-tist.
[God creating a jellyfish]
God: How about an evil bag?
water puppy
How do fish get high?
Because they eat seaweed.
What's a kind of cat that lives in the water? Octopus.
Did you hear about the clam that could play violin?
It had excellent mussel memory.
What is a gathering of octopuses called?
Octoposse.
If Finding Nemo was scientifically correct, Marlin would have changed into a female and mated with Nemo.
What did the diver say when he was trapped in seaweed?
- Kelp!
I've always wanted to WAVE to a dolphin, but it could never SEA me.
That dolphin is so WASHED up. WATER you say we get revenge?
Octopus, more like octopussy.
What do you call an imposter octopus?
Octosus.
How many times do you tickle an octopus to make it laugh?
Ten-tickles.
What did one shark say to the other while eating a clownfish?
What do clams do on their birthday? They shell a brat.
What are 8 people hiding in a corner because they're scared?
An octopus.
Why would you never donate to crabs?
Because they're shellfish!
How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
8 jelly tickles!