Marine biology jokes
All right, I know one joke. Um, there's a mollusk, see? And he walks up to a sea...
Well, he doesn't walk up, he swims up.
Well, actually, the mollusk isn't moving, he's in one place.
And then the sea cucumber, well, they... I mixed up.
There was a mollusk and a sea cucumber. None of them were walking, so forget that...
There was this mollusk and he walks up to a sea cucumber. Normally they don't talk, sea cucumbers, but in a joke, everyone talks.
So just then, the sea cucumber looks over to the mollusk and says, "With fronds like these, who needs anemones?"
Why do crabs never give to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
Hahahahahahahaha what a knee slapper!
Octopus, more like octopussy.
How many tickles does it take to tickle an octopus?
Tentacles!
What did one shark say to the other while eating a clownfish?
Why don't sharks eat n****rs? They think it's whale shit.
What are 8 people hiding in a corner because they're scared?
An octopus.
If Finding Nemo was scientifically correct, Marlin would have changed into a female and mated with Nemo.
What do you call a female octopus? An octopussy.
What do clams do on their birthday? They shell a brat.
How do fish get high?
Because they eat seaweed.
A fully grown bull Great White Shark is 15 feet long and can open its jaws up to 1.2 meters long. It could eat a small child in seconds. Anyways, I lost my job at the aquarium...
What do you call an imposter octopus?
Octosus.
What do you feed a group of octopuses for dessert?
Octopie!
What's a kind of cat that lives in the water? Octopus.
Where does the killer whale go to get its teeth done?
The orca Don-tist.
What is a shark’s favorite TV show? Sea-S-I.
What are fish not allowed to have?
Seaweed.
How do you make an octopus laugh?
Ten-tickles.
How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
8 jelly tickles!