Mar jokes
Do you think Mars prefers Sour Orbiters sweet?
Orbiter: "Or bitter?"
What do you call a war dodo named Bob in WW2 and he came from Mars?
Bruno Mars.
So Johnny Depp made an appearance on the MTV Video Music Awards as an astronaut. It really looks like he wants to be the new Elon Musk, whatever career path is most viable for Depp. I got to admit, if launching crystal meth into your nostrils and your anus is as viable as launching rockets to Mars, Johnny Depp would surpass Elon Musk in net worth.
Then again, the money Depp spends on alcohol each month, he could have bought all of Michael Bloomberg's penthouses in Manhattan. Sure sounds like he also shares the same financial advisor as Donald Trump, who thought it was a magnificent idea to launch Trump Airlines and Trump Ice. He already shares the same pro-Kremlin lawyer, by the way.
Why is Mars red? Because it saw Uranus! 馃槀
They found water on Mars. Mars:1 Africa:0
What do you get when you put a suicide bomber in a wheel chair? An RC-XD.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? Orphans don't get picked.
So that's why...
What is an alien's favourite chocolate?
A Mars bar.
NASA recently found evidence of water on Mars... Mars 1, Africa 0.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on Mars? Mars Rover.
According to scientists, there has been a discovery of water on Mars.
Mars-1
Africa-0
Why is Mars red and not orange? Because it would be too bright.
What's a horse's favorite football player? NEIGH-mar!
If Bruno Mars was to run a pub and sell chocolate bars other than alcoholic drinks, then he'd have to call his pub a Mars Bar!
Does that neverending forehead of yours go all the way to Mars, holy fucking shit?
A scientist discovered water on Mars. Mars 1, Africa 0.
Your mama is so fat that when she jumped, they found water on Mars.
Yo forehead so big, NASA thought it was Mars.
Chuck Norris has gone to Mars. That's why there is no life on it.
NASA just found evidence of water on Mars. Mars 1, Africa 0.
What's the sun's favorite chocolate? Mars bar.
I was being interviewed by Elon Musk. He asked, "Where are you from?" and I said Portugal. He replied, "So you are a fellow countryman of a Pen merchant whose freekick ball broke my rover on Mars. Get out!!" Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Penaldo, for costing me my dream job!