Man

Man jokes

Steak

So the man asks me, "Jesus, how do you want your steak?"

So I said, "Well done, my good faithful servant, well done."

Fear

My worst fear is being trapped in a lift with a man who is confident he can fix it.

Stomach

Why is it everyone wants to rub a pregnant woman's stomach but never the man's balls where the baby actually came from and the real ones that deserve the congratulations?

Garden

A man is digging in his garden and finds a gold chest. He goes to tell his wife.

Then he remembers why he was digging in the garden...

Memes

Food

What do you call it when a man wants food in Panera?

Panera bread serving food.

Level

Man #1: Pretend your age is a level, I am Level 20.

Man #2: My son died at level 4.

Man #1: Lol, your son is a noob.

Orphan

Why can’t an orphan be gay?

Because they have no one to call “daddy.”

Dinosaur

What did the caveman say while seeing a reptile taking off?

Look at that dino-sour!

Bike

I saw a black man riding a brand new bike, so I went home to check my garage. It’s all good because I still saw mine still chained to the floor begging for food.

Heart

The first thing a man looks at in a woman, is her heart.

The fact that her breasts block the view is not her fault.

Ass

I look at my girlfriend’s ass like a homeless man looks at a trash can.

Like it’s my next meal.

Rape

The amount of women judging me for raping a poor lady is terrible. You weren't there. You don't know!

Office

A man was walking down the street with a swivel chair under one arm, a computer under the other, and a desk strapped to his back.

A policeman ran over to him and handcuffed him, saying, "I'm arresting you for impersonating an office, sir!"

Pac-Man

Why do women like Pac-Man so much?

How else can you get eaten three times for a quarter?

Maze

Why couldn't the man get out of the maize maze?

He got corn-ered!

Asian

Why are all Asians so skinny?

Because last time there was a fat man a whole population disappeared.