Mama jokes

Yo mama's so fat, she irons her clothes on the driveway.

Yo mama so fat, when she put on a yellow raincoat people see her and yell "Hey yo, taxi!"

Yo mama so UGLY... at the strip club... people pay her... to keep her clothes ON!!!

Yo mama so fat, when she landed on the earth, the earth cracked like eggs. LOL.

Yo mama is so old, I told her to act her age, and she died.

Yo mama so stupid, she shoved two AA batteries up her ass and started singing, "I’ve Got The Power!"

Yo Mama is so FAT, it wasn't an iceberg that sank it, she was called, "THE MAMABERG!"

Yo mama so fat Trump built a wall around her and not the border.

Yo mama so poor, she chased a garbage truck with a shopping list.

Little Johnny was in kindergarten, and his teacher said, "Okay, everyone, tomorrow you must come to school and recite the first three letters of the alphabet." Johnny didn't know the alphabet, so he decided to ask his family. He walked into the kitchen to find his mom on the phone. He says, "Mama, what's the first letter of the alphabet?" His mom doesn't notice him standing there and says, "If you don't shut the fuck up right now-" So he goes to find his brother watching TV, and he says, "Tommy, what's the second letter of the alphabet?" His brother doesn't notice him and says, "I'm Batman." So he went to his grandma who was knitting and says, "Grandma, what's the third letter of the alphabet?" The grandma then realizes she left her biscuits in the oven for too long and says, "My biscuits are burning! My Biscuits are burning!" Satisfied with the answers given to him, he thinks it over and goes to school the next morning. When his teacher comes to Johnny, she says, "Johnny, what are the first three letters of the alphabet?" "If you don't shut the fuck up right now," Johnny says. "Who do you think you are, young man, to talk to someone like me that way?" the teacher asks. "I'm Batman," Johnny says. The teacher whups his ass, and little Johnny says, "My biscuits are burning! My Biscuits are burning!"

Later that day, he understands what happened and can't tell which was worse, that he accidentally cussed at his teacher or that his family was ignoring him.

Yo mama so fat...

...people in Florida start buying flood insurance when they see her waddling toward the ocean.

Yo mama is so ugly, she gave Michael Myers nightmares.

Yo mama so poor she eats cereal with a fork to save milk.

Yo mama is such a creep; she thought PTSD stood for "Please Touch Small Dicks."

Your mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale the doctor asked for her weight, not her phone number.

Your mama is so fat, she needs two phones to take a picture of herself.

Your mama so fat, it took all the trees to build her a coffin.

When your mama went to Sea World, the whales started singing, "We are family, even though you're fatter than me!"

Yo mama so ugly, when she went to an ugly contest, they told her, "No pros allowed."

Yo mama so fat that the US (Mexico) and North Korea (South Korea) got into a war fighting over who gets to use her as their border wall.