Male

Male jokes

Gay male

122 views ·

If a gay white male with blond hair is a prostitute, you will get $175.00 back for a blowjob if you give him $20.00. If you give a can of sauerkraut to a gay white male that is a prostitute with blonde hair and who is also Polish, you will get the money back that he paid for the can of sauerkraut if you wanted him to give you a blowjob. And if you wanted a blowjob from a gay white male that is a prostitute that is Canadian and Polish with blond hair, you will get the money back he paid for the bottle of maple syrup at the grocery store if you wanted him to give you a blowjob. But if you wanted to fuck him up the ass, he will give you the money back that he paid for the can of Crisco and he will also give you the money back that he paid for the box of condoms and he will give you the change back that he paid for the box of tampons that he paid for his baby sister or you could get a free anonymous blowjob at an adult book store.

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  • Superman

    411 views ·

    Superman and Flash were in the living room pounding back a few beers. Flash says to Superman, "I bet you can fly into Wonder Woman's bedroom and get the best pussy of your life." So he does it. When he goes back to Flash, Superman says, "Man, that was great, but my ass kinda burns."

    Rape

    96 views ·

    A 28 year old woman, Olga, in Meshchovsk, Russia took justice into her own hands when a 32 year old male robber, Viktor, decided to rob her salon. She tied him, feeding him only Viagra, having sex with him over and over. After a few days, she released him after he stated he learned his lesson and wouldn't go to the police. He lied and went to the police anyways. Both were arrested.

    After his sentence was over, Viktor sat down to speak to the local news. The reporter asked Viktor, "How was this whole ordeal?" Viktor replied, "I've had better."

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  • Forehead

    10 views ·

    Teacher: This assignment is big.

    Student (male): I have something that's big.

    Teacher: Yeah, your forehead.

    Google

    2 views ·

    Man A: "Is Google male or female?"

    Man B: "Female, because it does not let you finish the sentence before making a suggestion."

    Fire Truck

    43 views ·

    Little Johnny asks a fireman, "Do you want to see my fire truck?"

    So the fireman goes to look at it. Little Johnny tested it. "I got my hat in my fire truck."

    So the fireman says, "Last night's alright, but why is it tied up to you wagging?" And he looks closer and sees the string is tied up in knots. He said, "That's nice all right, but why is it tied up to his nuts?"

    The little Johnny said, "Well that's my son," and so he yanks on it.

    Bounty

    34 views ·

    So, I heard Bounty, the maker of paper towels, has decided to get into the Male Enhancement business...

    ...their new slogan?

    The Quicker Pecker Upper.

    Suicide

    9 views ·

    If 80% of all suicides in the UK are males, and women want equality, then maybe they should just kill themselves.

    Blowjob

    548 views ·

    Did you ever receive an anonymous blowjob from another male under the handicapped stall inside the public men's restroom at a rest area and did you have an orgasm and was it the best orgasm that you ever had?

    Brojob

    17 views ·

    Why does a heterosexual man believe that if a heterosexual man gets his dick sucked by another heterosexual man it's called a "brojob"?

    Because it's male bonding.

    Woman

    4 views ·

    I don't ever really bother women, but when I do, I usually just want to talk. I guess since I just so happened to be a straight male that's not a 10 or a 5, I get shutdown so fast. I put out lit candles...like damn, I thought I hid my ring.

    Job

    30 views ·

    My mom told me that she got a new job & I don't have to leave the house.

    Then my mom told all my customers are the men that live in our neighborhood.

    Then I ask what is your job call. My mom said job hand, then I said job and or is hand job.

    My mom said yeah that it. My mom said I'm good at my job that why all the males are always knocking at the door.