Line jokes

What is an orphan's hated movie line?

E.T. phone home.

I took the trash to the recycling bin, and two days later, my mom asked me, "Where's your sister?" I said, "In the recycling line to be turned into a bottle."

Pickup line: Are you the internet? 'Cause I feel a connection.

Why does Ezra Miller’s Flash run in a straight line in The Flash movie? Bro ain’t straight.

Setting: Funeral Home

Customer: Yes, I was considering what would be the best option for cheap cremation, but I feel that's silly to ask.

Funeral Director: Oh! We do have these nice urns over here at a discounted 75 percent off.

Customer: Okay? What's the catch? That's almost 300 dollars off?

Funeral Director: I assure you these are top-of-the-line urns and will keep your loved ones' remains secure and dry.

Customer: Okay?

Funeral Director: Yep, these have only been used once, so it is absolutely worth the purchase.

By: MiniMemorials.com

I have two things I wanna say:

1. When people swear, stop taking it so fucking literally. If someone calls you a bitch, they're not calling you a female dog. If they call you a cunt, they're not calling you a woman's private part, they are calling you either an idiot, scaredy cat/baby, or something along those lines, ffs.

2. wtf

Your hairline is so curved that McDonald's hired you to be their "M."

Your hairline went so back, you had to cry to your mama!

Sorry for this Pick Up Line.

Are you a building? Because I rate you 9/11, so let me put my plane in and let kids fall out.

Will Smith slapped your hairline to space.

Why can’t anyone sing “hit me with your best shot” at the veterans ball karaoke?

Because every time she sang the line “fire away,” someone started shooting!

This is just a bad emo pickup line, lmao.

Are you Maria? 'Cause you can sure as hell count ME in!

Ferb is older than Phineas because his last line.

Ferb: "I’m boutta blow this sh*t!"

For those of you greener than a Mexican's card when it comes to this website, it's darker than the unemployment line.

Bro has to get a fringe to cover up the big, increasing hairline.

Your hairline goes so far back you have to wear sunscreen.

What do you call a group of rappers waiting in line?

A rhyme queue.

Daveon is so straight, he thinks a straight line is the shortest distance between two points and nothing else.

Why did the rapper bring a pencil to the concert?

In case he needed to drop some FRESH LINES.

Your hairline looks like Thanos snapped your hair out of existence.