Line

Line jokes

Plan

  • Bully: Ur Gay.

    Me: I'M STRAIGHTER THAN THE LINE IN OSAMA BIN LADIN'S PLAN.

    Bully: *runs away and hears crash*

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    Shark

  • A lawyer bought a beautiful yacht. He invited the law firm to come aboard for a great weekend.

    Saturday night was the candle light dinner and Sam drank too much, walked on the deck and fell over the rail into the water and was calling for help. Tom said, "Oh no, the sharks will get him." All of the party lined along the rail and noticed the sharks were swimming around him in a circle. Jim said, "The sharks are not even bothering him!" And a shark lifted up his head out of the water and said, "Professional Courtesy."

    Guy

  • A guy cut me in the lunch line. After that, a rock was thrown at him by my friend.

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    Flash

  • Why does Ezra Miller’s Flash run in a straight line in The Flash movie? Bro ain’t straight.

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    Sister

  • I took the trash to the recycling bin, and two days later, my mom asked me, "Where's your sister?" I said, "In the recycling line to be turned into a bottle."

    Cremation

  • Setting: Funeral Home

    Customer: Yes, I was considering what would be the best option for cheap cremation, but I feel that's silly to ask.

    Funeral Director: Oh! We do have these nice urns over here at a discounted 75 percent off.

    Customer: Okay? What's the catch? That's almost 300 dollars off?

    Funeral Director: I assure you these are top-of-the-line urns and will keep your loved ones' remains secure and dry.

    Customer: Okay?

    Funeral Director: Yep, these have only been used once, so it is absolutely worth the purchase.

    By: MiniMemorials.com

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    Building

  • Sorry for this Pick Up Line.

    Are you a building? Because I rate you 9/11, so let me put my plane in and let kids fall out.

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    Karaoke

  • Why can’t anyone sing “hit me with your best shot” at the veterans ball karaoke?

    Because every time she sang the line “fire away,” someone started shooting!

    Hell

  • This is just a bad emo pickup line, lmao.

    Are you Maria? 'Cause you can sure as hell count ME in!

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  • Distance

  • Daveon is so straight, he thinks a straight line is the shortest distance between two points and nothing else.

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