Letter jokes

Did you know the "w" in Africa stands for water?

Hello.

What comes next in the pattern, ottffs?

S, because it represents numbers going up: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven.

Words that have "ho" in them:

Thot

Whore

Asshole

Horrible

Horena (my ex gf)

A, B, C, D, E, F, G, I will kill your family.

What are the four letters you don’t want to hear from a dentist?

I C D K

I can make a word with those: "DICK".

1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.

2. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a water-melon.

3. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? “Put it on my bill.”

4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.

5. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river.

6. Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils.

7. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope.

8. How does the ocean say hello? It waves.

9. What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.

10. What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee.

11. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota (as in, “mini-soda”).

12. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.

13. Apparently, you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff.

14. Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat.

15. Where do hamburgers go dancing? They go to the meat-ball.

16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.

17. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.

I'm friends with 2 letters of the alphabet. I don't know why.

Lil Johnny's teacher wanted to play an alphabet game, so she said, "What word starts with A?" Lil Johnny raised his hand fast, but she knew that he would say "ass," so she picked on Sally and she said, "Apple." She said, "What word starts with B?" Little Johnny raised his hand as fast as he could, but she knew that he would say something like "bitch," so she picked on Emmanuel and Emmanuel said, "Banana." She went all the way to W. Little Johnny raises hand as fast as he could again, and the teacher thought of a cuss word that could start with the letter W. She could not think of a cuss word that could start with W, so she called on Little Johnny. Little Johnny said, "Wow." The teacher said, "Good job." Then Little Johnny said, "Like wow, two elephants fucking!"

a

What did the O say to the O? "O hi O!" (Ohio)

Depressed should be spelled "depraseed" because then they would be 1, 2, 5, 9.

You know, "f" in orphan stands for family.

Did you know that the "F" in orphan stands for family?

qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm!

What is at the end of a rainbow?

The w.

All the traffic stopping the cars, how do you spell that without any R’s?

That.

Why do tables never need wheelchairs?

Because even without the ‘t’ they are still able.

Dang... if I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put D IN U ;)

I only know there are 25 letters in the alphabet, I don't know Y.

(Me: How many letters are in the alphabet?) -- (Friend: 11- T-H-E-- A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T)

(Me: There are 20 letters in the alphabet, right?) -- (Crush: No, there is actually 26.) -- (Me: oooOoh, I forgot u r a qt! So its acdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz?) -- (Crush: You forgot the D) -- (Me: That's not needed yet ;])

What letter is really hot? T

C = cOCK O = CoCK C = COcK K = COCk COCK = cock cock = COCK

ME SExUAL SRrY LoL

abcdef ghijklmnop qrstuv.