Kind jokes
What kind of number hates nuts?
17.
POV: Wine Taster in hell.
I was sitting with the best wine ever made on the table in front of me. This silhouette begins to speak, "You have risen to be the most superb Wine Taster on Earth. Then you got run over by a truck hauling freshly made wine to a warehouse. Your crimes are as follows: you left your high school prom date with another man after you got her pregnant, you let your mother believe that the cat ran away after you drowned it in the pool, and you never got married. How do you plead?"
The man looked at the silhouette like it was a purple rabbit.
"Guilty," said the man, "but if you would be so kind would you at least tell me what the wine in front of me tastes and smells like? I will take any punishment you deem fit."
"Very well," said the silhouette, "but you will regret that request."
Out of the shadows comes a boy only looking 19 years old. The boy says, "I will you taster today. I am confident about my sense of taste." The boy takes the first bottle and opens it, pours it into a wine glass, and swirls it around. He then takes a sniff and begins to drink, to the Wine Taster he says, "Mmmm, taste like chicken."
What's a rapper's favorite kind of tree?
CYPRESS HILL.
What’s a kind midget’s favorite type of joke? Short and sweet.
What kind of wall is the biggest? A whall.
Memes
The 9/11 and the Spanish flu are kind of similar.
The Spanish flu was a very dangerous flu, and in 9/11, something very dangerous flew.
What kind of dress does a Roblox Floppa house have?
"ADDRESS!"
What kind of punch do little kids give to other little kids? The Sandy Hook.
What kind of fish do people eat?
Deep-fried fish.
What kind of tree can you High-Five?
A palm tree.
What kind of pizza can't an orphan order?
Familiar pizza.
Q. What kind of school does an ice cream man go to?
A. Sunday school!
Psst! Don't understand? Well, "Sunday" sounds like "Sundae." Get it now? Nope? Sorry. Plus, it's an ice cream homophone joke.
What is the richest kind of air?
A millionaire.
What kind of music do elves listen to? Wrap music.
My wife and I watched the movie Indecent Proposal last night. Afterwards, I asked her if she'd sleep with Robert Redford for $1,000,000. She said, "Sure, but where am I gonna get that kind of money?"
What kind of shells do tanks use to cheat?
A-cheat shells.
What's a rapper's favorite kind of pet?
A boomboxer.
What kind of food does a lesbian love? Anything they can eat out.
What do people get for Christmas when they behave badly? They get coal. Why coal, you're probably saying, because the true meaning is cucks of all kinds.
What kind of bull doesn’t have horns?
A bullfrog!