Kind jokes
What kind of dog can do magic tricks?
A labracadabrador.
What kind of knight puts dumb jokes on the internet?
You!
I'm always forgetting these kinds of jokes. I also forgot my son's name.
What kind of Panera Bread do pencils use?
Panera Lead.
What kind of chair inhabits your soul?
A hair!
Abortion clinics are kind of like NAZI gas chambers. Less people come out than go in.
What's a kind of cat that lives in the water? Octopus.
What kind of shit does a ghost take every time? A spooky dookie!
China has a population of a billion people. One billion.
That means even if you’re a one in a million kind of guy, there are still a thousand others exactly like you.
What kind of bath bomb does an emo person use?
A toaster.
What kind of bee can't fly?
A KOBE.
Why don’t you act like your hairline and kindly take several steps back?
Slavery and discipline, it's kind of the same thing. You get whipped for doing the wrong thing.
What kind of candy do astronauts eat in space?
Mars bars.
I walk in from work to find my wife dead on the sofa.
As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of sick fuck does that?
Apparently Steven Hawking was a stand-up kind of guy.
When the guy next to you says that he kind of agrees with the villain.
Me watching a World War 2 documentary.
What kind of cars do Mexicans drive?
A Juanda.
My lesbian friends bought me a nice watch for my birthday. I think they got confused when I said, "I wanna watch."
What kind of tree fits into your hand? A palm tree.