Kid jokes

What’s the difference between a normal kid and an Emo?

When you feel an Emo's arm, there’s lots of texture! Feels great, too!

What do you call a kid in a wheelchair going through a fire? Ghost Rider.

What's the most confusing day of the year for an illegitimate kid?

Father's Day.

What do you call a kid with no friends?

A Sandy Hook survivor.

An emo kid and a silent kid would be a good acquaintance because the emo would wish to die, and the silent kid would be the nice guy and grant that wish.

If a kid refused to go to bed, does that make them guilty of resisting a rest?

What was Stephen Hawking's favorite toy as a kid?

Hot Wheels.

What's a similarity of an orphan and a deaf kid?

They both can't hear their parents.

So, a mom and a dad take their son to a therapist.

“What seems to be the problem?” the therapist asked.

“Our son thinks he’s a refrigerator!” they said.

So the therapist replies, “Oh dear, that must be a problem.”

“Yeah, he sleeps with his mouth open, and the light is really bright.”

Michael J. Fox walks into the grocery store to buy some salt. When he comes out, a kid turns to his mother and says, "Look mom, a salt shaker!"

What's the autistic kid's favorite song? Yours.

I stole a wheelchair from a disabled kid. What is he going to do, stand up?

So this guy thought he was funny by pissing on the floor and not in the urinal.

Later on, I guess some kid ran into the bathroom because, well, he probably had to go, but yeah, he slipped and fell and hit his head on the urinal, so all in all it was a pretty good prank on his part.

I say 1, 2, 3, all the kids bullied me, but now they're not so cool, cuz I shot up the school.

I don’t see why people say that emo kids don’t like to hangout. I seen them hanging all day.

I saw a Down syndrome kid waving at me today, but there's no way I'm swimming all the way over there to save him.

"Eugheugh," said the boy.

How do you think they found out cows produce milk?

Two kids having fun in the barn.

Roses are red, violets are blue, don't let your kids next to Prince Andrew.

I don't know.

Kid: Dad, what's a dark joke?

Dad: Well, you see that guy over there? Tell him to wave.

Kid: But Dad, I'm blind.

Dad: Exactly, also the dude had no arm.