Kid jokes
The gay kid tried to shoot up the school, but his shots would not go straight.
Why do emo kids drink only herbal tea? Because proper tea is theft.
Why did the emo kid cross the road? To get a box of tissues!
I told an emo kid that we were going to hang (hangout), but they took it too literal.
What present did the armless kid get for Christmas?
He got gloves. Ohh, sorry, he could never open the present.
Why did the orphan not call 911 when he saw a tower catch fire?
'Cause he did not want any kids to go through the same pain.
What's an orphan's favorite movie?
"Home Alone."
I threw a lamp at the depressed kid. I was just trying to brighten up his day.
What do you call an autistic kid going down the stairs in a wheelchair?
Hot Wheels!
Why do orphan kids never eat homemade food? Because they don’t even have one!
Why did Michael Jackson divorce LMP? She didn't want to give him kids.
A kid told me to go get a dad, so I punched the kid. He went to tell his parents. Oh wait, he can't, 'cause he's an orphan, and orphans have no parents.
Friends = your power level.
Emo kid = power level: 0000.
What's the difference between a paralyzed kid and a father?
The father gets to leave, while the kid stays.
Emo chick: "I wish I could feel dead inside!"
The kid named Dead: "😄😄😄"
I gave a deaf kid AirPods.
I told a blind kid, "See you later!"
One day, a girl was showering with her mom. She pointed at her mom's breasts and asked: "When can I get these?" Her mother replied: "In about 6 to 7 years when you grow up :)".
The other day, the girl's showering with her dad, and she pointed at his penis and asked: "When can I get this?" Her dad looked around and replied: "In about 20 minutes when your mom leaves the house."
What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and kids?
I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
When I saw a kid fall with no legs, I said, "Just walk it off!"