What joke do you tell an orphan?
Knock Knock...
Who' there?
Not your parents
I can count the number of times I've been to Chernobyl on one hand. -- It's seven.
What is the similarity between a joke and food?
Some people just don't get them!
What’s red and in a corner ? A baby with a razor blade What’s green and in a corner ? The same baby three weeks later
Why done orphans get offended by dark humor?
It doesn’t hit home
What does your first football game and your first time having sex have in common? You were bloody and battered but at least you're dad came.
I was sitting with my little brother when he was about four-ish. He was starting to really like to identify objects for some reason, so he was showing me his toys. He grabbed his toy Mator truck and then pointed to the wheels, saying, “These are wheels.” I said, “Good job, yes they are.” Then he pointed to the bumper and said, “This is a bumper.” Again, I congratulated him. Then, he grabbed the toy’s wire with the hook at the end and said, “And this is a hooker.” I died laughing.
How many dead prostitutes does it take to change a light bulb? -- Obviously not 8, because its still dark in my basement.
What's the difference between meat and fish?
If you beat your fish, it'll die.
i ate a clock yesterday. it was very time-consuming
A lion, Johnny Depp, and a hockey player from Nashville all have one thing in common.
They're all Predators!
There once was a brother and a sister so one night it's storming really bad and the sister goes into the brothers room and asks " can I stay with you tonight because I'm scared" the brother replies with " yea sure but just don't tell Mom" so the girl climbs into the bed and looks under the sheets to see the boys penis and asks "what's that?" And the boy replies with "that's my pet snake" and the girl asks "can I pet it?" And the boy says "sure just don't tell Mom" and the boy falls asleep and wakes up in a hospital and asks "what happened" and the girl said "I pet the snake but it spit on me so I bit it's head off"
Girl: How do you feel about abortion? Dad: Ask your sister Girl: I don't have a ...
What’s the difference between a Ferrari and ten 6 year olds?
I don’t have a Ferrari in my garage
“Wanna play the rape game?”
“No!!!!”
“That’s the spirit!”
guy spills milk on a me i say " it's OK we all make mistakes sometimes but apparently your mom made a big one
i thought my wife was joking when she said she was gunna leave me because i wouldn’t stop singing “im a believer” but then i saw her face
Two men walk into a bar you’d think the second one would’ve seen it
A high school student and his best friend were rushing to class after his best friend caused them both to be late, his best friend asked, "Would you like to hear a joke?" "Sure" he replied. "What do you and your sister have in common?' "I don't know." "Because of me you're both late for your next period."
What's the difference between Hitler and a feminist?
At least Hitler actually did something
