Joke jokes
What's yellow and can't swim? My mom on Halloween.
What are the 3 shortest words in the English language?
“Is It In?”
I would slap you, but that would be animal abuse.
I hope there is a lift to heaven. I shouldn’t be making jokes though.
What's the difference between Autism and Gender?
Autism is on a spectrum.
Son: Daddy, why is this red soup so sweet?
Because your mother had diabetes.
What's a pedophile's favorite place to go in?
Kum and Go.
What did mama cow say to baby cow? -- "It's pasture bedtime."
What do you call a cow grazing a field with 50% grass and 50% weed?
High steaks gambling.
How can you tell if a heterosexual man has been using a computer?
There is sperm on the screen.
What did the Asian say to the Asian?
*Cough*
Well, I'm off to the orphanage to tell yo mama jokes.
Déjà Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
A man went to a Ford dealership hoping to find a car, but he said they weren't affordable.
What’s the difference between a tire and three-hundred-sixty-five used condoms?
One’s a good year; the other’s a great year!
What do orphans need in order to mail letters?
Food stamps.
I tried a pun about water, but people "sea" right through it, and when people complain, they are usually just being a beach.
Why is 3 such a helpful number? Because 3 helped out on a science project 4 5!
I'm so lonely, even the alphabet says "Hi."
JK.
What's a duck's favorite drug?
Cwack.