New Joke Jokes - Page 119 - Worst Jokes Ever

Jesus and Moses come back to Earth.

Moses says, "Let's go down to the ocean and see if I can do what I used to when I was here before." So Moses raises his arms and motions to part the waters. Sure enough, he is able to part the waters just as before.

Jesus quips, "Close the water, I'm going to try to do what I used to when I was here last." So Jesus walks out on top of the water, then sinks to the bottom. He crawls out pulling seaweed off of him. Moses says, "Hey, it's not your fault, you didn't have those holes in your feet before."

What did God say to the black person?

"Oops, I burned one."😳

Not racist, just funny.

How does an Alabama mother know when her daughter is on her period? She can taste the blood on her son’s penis.

Spell "I cup." It's funny.

Mom: Can I tell you a joke?

Kid: Sure.

Mom: Knock knock.

Kid: Who's there?

Mom: Not yo.

Kid: Not yo who?

Mom: Not yo father.

Kid: Not yo husband either.

Everyone stop making 9/11 jokes; they just don't fly.

Hi, I’m Joe.

What is the difference between a suicidal person and you?

None, you are both dead on the inside. Lol.

Charlene's hairline was so big that Joe Biden could not make it prime minister.

Your mum's hairline was so big that Dora the Explorer could not find it.

Why did the Dinosaur cross the road?

'Cause the Chicken wasn't born yet.

A depressed kid takes a drink of water and someone takes it and takes a drink. "Oh come on, the train stopped, the rope broke, I couldn't get on the building, the gun was empty, the knife was dull, the bridge was too low, and the cliff was nonexistent, and now you took the poison!"