Job jokes
I saw a kid crying and I asked him where his parents were...
Man, I love working at an orphanage.
My mom told me that she got a new job & I don't have to leave the house.
Then my mom told all my customers are the men that live in our neighborhood.
Then I ask what is your job call. My mom said job hand, then I said job and or is hand job.
My mom said yeah that it. My mom said I'm good at my job that why all the males are always knocking at the door.
Why do asses make terrible spies?
Because they always CRACK under pressure.
Patient: Sorry I'm so nervous, this is my first surgery.
Doctor: Oh, don't worry, mine too!
What is a Care Bear's favorite job?
Take care of bears.
What do you call an Indian gravedigger?
Digdeep.
Boss: You're fired.
Me: *pauses porn* Why?
Why did the Scarecrow get a promotion?
Because it was OUTSTANDING in the field! 💀💀😂😂😂😂😂
To a Mexican person: When I first met you, I thought you were going to say, "My name is Enrique, I have a job for you."
Why does the pimp always use job fairs as a way of recruiting new hoes?
He always gets a great turnout.
Rapboat says he has a rap career. Wrap career more like, wrapping burgers at McDonald's.
My aunt worked as a human cannonball.
I'm not sure if she was good at it until she got fired.
Why do blondes make bad bank robbers?
Because they tie up the safe and blow the guards.
Q: Why did the teacher die?
A: Because he hated his life.
Just because you have a career in the North doesn't mean you are North Korean.
Donald Trump is getting all the perks of 2020. He got COVID and lost his job.
When the orphan got a job as a priest, what was his name?
Father Les.
Why did Daveon get fired from his job at the orange juice factory? Because he couldn't concentrate.
A surgeon loses his job as he botched a surgery.
boss: "We have to let you go."
surgeon: "I protest innocence."
boss: "How?"
surgeon: "I thought doing your job and saving people's lives were two different things."
boss: "Get out!"
As I get older, I remember all the people I lost along the way. Maybe a career as a tour guide was not the right choice.