it's jokes

When you send your girl a dick pic, but she says it's small, so you text back and say:

"Enjoy the little things."

I have a saying. Whenever you find a sink, there's probably a dead baby inside it...

Could it be ligma?

Ligma balls, daddy!

This is a big joke, so yeah, you can't tell me what to do. This joke is funny, so laugh, okay?

Now that you're done laughing, let me say a joke... Get it? There was no joke! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahhahhaha lololol so funny, I'm ninja!

Is it bad to hit an orphan?

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

Well... I mean, they could go to church and try to gather that someone hit them.

Why was the pregnant cow mad all the time? It wasn’t in for the moo-d.

Why can’t you run in a campground?

Because it’s past tents.

The QUEEN took a shit at the poker table. It was a ROYAL FLUSH.

What are you doing, son? It has been an hour, and you are still in front of the mirror closing your eyes.

Mum, actually I want to see how I look while sleeping...

What time is it when you get home, can walk walk home and walk walk home from school?

What time is it when you get home and you walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school? Oooooo day, a great night for

I did a walk today, but it was so much better, and a walk home. I had dinner. Night was good fun at home. Night was good night. I was a little off, but you were so fun to be a night.

A: It’s very delicious! Great! Fantastic!

B: Thank you.

A: People don’t speak when they eat delicious foods!

A: This rice is very delicious!

B: Ya! It is more delicious if it is cooked.

Why can you trust a donut? It tells the hole truth!

What's the difference between a man's wife and his dog?

Lock them both in the trunk for three hours and see which is happy to see you when you open it.

Is your tap water running well?

Beta, go catch it!

I was talking to a Muslim yesterday, and he asked me what it's like to be blind.

I happened to tell him about 20 jokes; in fact, I was working on my twentieth. So I answered with, "At least I don't have to screw in light bulbs. It's not like I need the damn things anyway."

I went to the table to eat my egg, but I couldn't find it anywhere.

I think someone must've poached it.

Why did the skeleton never get cold? Because it went right through him!