it's jokes
They killed a whole family of crows... It was a murder!
They killed a bunch of ravens... What a conspiracy!
I made a website for orphans the other day... it doesn’t have a home page.
Why can't orphans eat a big bag of crisps?
'Cause it's family size...?!
If an orphan took a photo, what would it be called?
A self-me.
Yo mama so stupid, she made Patrick run away because he thought it was contagious! 🤣
LeT iT gOoOo
Why can't an orphan be in a Scream movie?
It's always someone you know.
I’m rather relaxed about death.
From quite an early age, I’ve regarded it as part of the deal, the unwritten guarantee that comes with your birth certificate.
Why is the sun so mean? Because it keeps ROASTING everyone!
If your parachute doesn't work, don't worry.
You have the rest of your life to figure it out.
Why can't orphans go to Costco?
Because it's a family shop.
How do I make my dick disappear?
I put it in your dad.
The thing about 9/11 and the jokes about it, for most people it flew over their head, for some it flew into their head.
"OH MY GOD! IT SPEAKS!"
Life isn't about pleasing yourself and that you have to do things for the sole benefit of God.
It’s like masturbation. Sometimes it’s not getting yourself off, but getting someone else off too. That’s what thighjobs are for.
I got the new phone with longer lasting battery, but it still lasts longer than your relationships, ooooooooooo!
You know that the F in orphan may stand for family, but it actually stands for "fuck family."
"I can lose 10 ugly pounds anytime I want -- I'll just cut off my head!"
Do you use humor to make light of your emotional eating and your weight? Make jokes about overeating and being fat as a way of getting along with other people? I was a Grand Champion at it.
Dark humor is like water. It exists.
"It looks like she went into Claire’s Boutique, fell on a sale rack, and said, ‘I’ll take it!’" — Bianca Del Rio, RuPaul’s Drag Race
I thought of you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.