it's jokes

What’s better than swinging a dead baby in circles over your head with a 5 foot rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

A new drug has been developed for lesbians with depression.

It’s called Trycoxagain.

How can you tell if an ant is a boy or a girl? If it sinks it’s a girl. If it floats, it’s boy-ant (buoyant).

dont make jokes about the accident my dad died in it he was the best pilot in all of Saudi Arabia :(

The blind person can’t eat fish, it’s “sea food”.

Neona: Gwen?

Gwen: Yes... what can I do for you?

Neona: You were so right! Mr. Smith has sexual problems and is a fool! I am so sorry that you were not a liar! PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!!!!

Gwen: You should have listened. Plus I'm over it!

Neona: Are you mad at me?

Gwen: Me? NEVER! Sometimes we listen and don't listen.

How did the nut study for its test?

It used the inter-nut.

It's April Fools' Day. I'm gonna go to the orphanage and tell kids, "Their parents are here to pick them up."

I was gonna tell a joke about a dead fetus, but I decided to abort it.

Kid: Hey, Dad.

Dad: You're an hour late.

Kid: No, it was two hours. Also, I was working on math.

Dad: By yourself?

Kid: No.

Dad: A boy?

Kid: I was with the teacher.

Albert is a homophobic guy. His cousin Franco is also a homophobic guy.

Albert's aunt and cousin have visited his parents, but Albert didn't know that because he came late at night. Franco was sleeping in Albert's bed, thinking he would not come home. Albert laid on his bed, thinking there was no one on it, and then they started fucking ^_*

No phobia lasts forever 👌😂

You’ve really gotta hand it to short people because they usually can’t reach it anyway.

Chuck Norris once threw a grenade and killed 80 people.

Then it exploded.

what's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? the trampoline doesn't cave in when i jump on it.

"Gosh, it's raining cats and dogs," said Suzie, looking out of the kitchen window.

"I know," said her mother, "I've just stepped in a poodle!"

Mom: I'm going to the shop. If someone is at the door, don't open it.

Me: Ok.

*Ring*

Me: Opens the door.

Oh sh*t!

Mom: Gets flip flop.

Yo hairline is so crooked it makes your gay best friend look straight.

Germany: As long as America stays out of the war, we should win.

Japan: *bombing Pearl Harbor* Cowabunga It Is!!

My girlfriend asked me whether I was having sex behind her back, and I replied, "Yes, who did you think it was?"

I was wondering why the frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me.