it's jokes
Your cow is so ugly, it scared the crap out of the toilet!
What do you call a hill with cows on it?
A Moo-ntain.
Why didn’t the bike stand on its own?
It was too tired.
Where do you find a cow with no legs?
Right where you left it!
Why did Ten die?
It was between 9/11.
Germany: As long as America stays out of the war, we should win.
Japan: *bombing Pearl Harbor* Cowabunga It Is!!
Did you hear about the Boston marathon? 'Cause, well, I heard it was a blast and that it blew everyone away!
Did you hear about the man that got fired from his can job? It was soda-pressing.
Why was the Chinese laundry joke not funny? It had no irony.
I got hit with a can of soda.
It doesn't matter, it was a soft drink.
How did Stephen Hawking make it up the stairway to heaven?
Well, he didn’t; they invented an elevator.
What did the pillow say as it fell off the bed? Oh sheet!
If Joey Deacon made his own company, it would be called The Joey Deacon Company; Walt Disney should have a run for its money.
P.S. The Joey Deacon Pictures logo would have some autistic people making noises to "When You Wish Upon A Star", with the castle being the Blue Peter ship instead.
"Why don't you want to taco 'bout it?"
"Cause I'm nacho friend anymore."
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
The hooker can wash out her crack and reuse it.
What do we want? Plane noises!
When do we need it? Neeooooooowwwww!
This guy tried to kill me, and I asked, "What is this? Friday the Thirteenth?" Michael replied, "Nah, it's Halloween."
Thanks for explaining the word "many" to me.
It means a lot!
I got my daughter a fridge for her birthday.
I can’t wait to see her face light up when she opens it.
Why did the M&M go to school?
It wanted to be a Smartie.