it's jokes
Want to hear a pencil joke?
Never mind, it’s pointless.
It's funny that everyone is depressed, like, I mean:
Bullys are depressed.
Nerds are depressed.
Bad girls/boys are depressed.
Kind humans are depressed.
Well, a boy and a girl are in a bathtub together.
The little boy says, “Hey, you see that? I’m gonna go ask Daddy what it is.” When the little boy asks his dad, he says, “Well, son, that’s your car. You try to park it in a girl’s parking spot.”
As the boy runs back, he see’s the little girl is missing. It had turned out that the little girl was asking her mama what her spot was and she said, “Well, that’s your parking spot. Never ever let a boy put it in.” When she got back, the little boy tried to put the car in, well he did and she ended up breaking his car that day.
There is a really, really small guy and his name is Adam, so I say, "Hey, look, it's an atom!"
Why is a moon rock tastier than an Earth rock? It’s a little meteor.
I can tell you a pun about a pencil, oh! Never mind, it’s pointless.
Why does the orange 🍊 beat the other fruits 🍎 in every race?
Because it never runs out of juice.
How did the chicken get to the other side? He crossed the road and didn't make it.
Welcome to Dave's Orphanage. "You make it, we take it."
Why did the silly boy take the Christmas tree to a barber?
Because his mother said it needed to be trimmed.
My friend said, "Dude, if you don't put your desk in line with the column, you're gay." So he did it, and I said, "Well, I guess now he's straight." ;D
Why is a moon rock tastier than an Earth rock?
Because it’s a little meteor.
I told my sister a Dairy joke.
She said it was cheesy.
My mom got a clown for my birthday, but it ended up being my sister. 🤡
How do angels 😇 make holy water 💧?
They boil the hell out of it.
How do pedophiles follow the law?
They drive it slow in the school zone.
Why can't orphans work at S.C. Johnson?
Cause it's a family company.
This man walks into a bar and says, "How do I get service here?"
The assistant bar attendant tells him to take a seat as the bartender will be there to serve him shortly. After 2 minutes, the man says this is ridiculous, that he has to wait. The assistant then offers him a bar snack of free nuts, which the man duly eats. Another 2 minutes go by, and the man then says, "OK, I get it, no service of beer, but free nuts," to which the assistant says, "Hell no, the game starts in 10 minutes." Everyone laughs and claps.
If you boil your funny bone, it becomes a laughing stock.
Life's too short to want it.