IT jokes
It's always fun to take anti-depressants, you either choose to take one, or the whole bottle.
Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be water melon.
Why was the orphan's first phone an iPhone X?
"It has no home button."
When the emo kid says let’s play truth or dare, You know it’s about to hang over.
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
Depresso espresso.
Nah, just kidding, it's bleach.
Hellen Keller went to town riding a pony, stuck a feather in her hat, and called it an "Unnghhtpthhh!"
What’s the difference between a retard and a zombie? Nothing much, they both dribble, moan, are hungry, walk weirdly, and it takes a bullet in the head to put them both down.
Why was the belt arrested?
It held up a pair of pants.
How is the business in Ukraine? It's booming.
Why does Little Johnny hate hot dogs?
It reminds him of last night.
Can emos eat a happy meal, or is it a depressed meal?
Q: How many children does it take to shingle a roof?
A: Depends on how thinly you slice them.
My BFF asked me: "You know why it took Carlos 3 days to move on?"
I said: "Why?"
My BFF says: "Well, it's because he was already cheating!"
I said: "KNEW IT!"
Little Johnny said he wanted a coffee, so his mom said he can have one.
He got an espresso, not knowing "depresso" came with it.
Little Johnny went up to his mom and said: "Can I have some milk?"
He waited for three hours to get an answer.
His mom finally said: "No, your dad still isn't back with it."
Anonymous 1: Why are you crying?
Anonymous 2: No, buddy, come to my finral.
I didn't steal it. 🌚
What is it called when an orphan takes a selfie?
A family photo.
My chocky milk, don't you touch my chocky milk! It's mine! No it's not! It's your face! Ccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccchhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooccccccccccccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
Yo momma is so stupid, she eats cardboard boxes thinking they're chocolate bars.
Why doesn't the orphan's phone have a homepage, being it doesn't have a home?