Bully: "I bet your dick is so small when you look down in the shower you can't even see it."
Guy: "No, I see your sister's head."
When my friend says I suck at something, I'm like, "U swallow."
You wanna hear a joke? It’s YOU.
A random guy yelled at me, "Hey, slut!"
I walked towards him.
"I prefer slit," I said.
"Why?" He asked.
"You see these wrists?" I spat at him.
What animal gets easily offended? The chicken; they always get roasted.
Your dick is as flat as your grandma's heart rate.
Whats that stupid Girl in you're Class called
ThOt
The Annoying Orange called Donald Trump a copycat.
There's no "I" in team, but there is a "U" in cunt.
My friend once said my opinion didn't matter. I said, "Why did you call me a female?"
Me:what’s that girls name from phinease and ferb the sister Crush:candice Me:candice dick fit in your mouth Crush: slaps me Walks away
A wife asks her husband: am I pretty or ugly? The husband awnsers her: pretty. The wife responds: thank yo- The husband interrupts her: PRETTY UGLY!
What did the sand say when it got into a fight with the ocean?
"Oh my God, you're such a beach!"
Roses are red, Violets are blue, A face like yours belongs in the zoo, But don't you worry, I'll be there too, Not in a cage, but laughing at you!
Yo mama is so poor, I saw her kicking a can and I asked her what she was doing and she said moving.
What do you call a fat bitch that eats cum from used condoms? Your mom!
Someone came to me and said “your dad is gay”. I just said “wait. You know where my dad is? Please tell me!”
Trump says to Obama, "You know it’s the White House, not the black house, right?" And Obama says, "Yeah, but it isn’t the orange house either."
Your mama so ugly, when Santa Claus came to her house and saw her, he said, "HO HO HOLY SHIT THAT'S ONE UGLY BITCH!"
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to the man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!" The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
