INS jokes
What will Donald Trump build in our devices?
A firewall.
What did the penis say to the condom?
"Cover me, I'm going in!"
What's thick, 12 inches, and in your mum's throat?
My penis.
Last week I told my psychiatrist, "I keep thinking about suicide," and he told me from now on I have to pay in advance.
Bought my son a trampoline for his birthday. The ungrateful fucker just sat in his wheelchair and cried.
That joke and paper have one thing in common: they're both tearable.
What's a person in a wheelchair's favorite sport?
Jousting.
What do you call a load of retards in a swimming pool?
Vegetable soup.
The sad thing is when they ride the scooters in Wal-Mart... Really, you declining to walk is what got your fat ass in that scooter to begin with... And damned if they aren't buying diet soda... Please... cull this shit... We don't need them in society... KFC is not a disease.
What does Stephen Hawking have in common with a bull? They both charge.
I have good faith in the glue police. They usually stick to their word.
When I get naked in the bathroom... the shower usually gets turned on!
Last night, I had a dream that I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. I guess it was just a Fanta sea!
What's worse than getting raped in a cemetery? Finding someone else's semen in your mom's corpse.
Two persons were in a car. The brakes were broken and they were going so fast that they would crash and die.
The driver said: "Oh no! We will die!" but the person sitting next to him replied: "Don't panic, the stop sign at the end of the road will stop us."
Why was Jesus not good at Basketball?
Because he died in the Cross 😈
What do women and peanut butter have in common?
They're both easy to spread.
What do Asians and John Cena have in common? You can't see me!
How do you confuse a blonde? Put it in a circle and tell it to sit in the corner.
Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle?
Because his wife died.