I was going to tell a dead baby joke. but I decided Abort
What starts with the letter M, ends with -arriage and is a man's favorite thing? Miscarriage. That joke never gets old, just like the baby.
Why did the United Nations stop the french government from using the guillotine in public?
because the french government was using the guillotine in public on newborn baby boys for circumcision.
What's the difference between dark humor and morbid humor? Dark humor would be saying, "ten babies in one trashcan." Morbid humor would be saying, "one baby in ten trashcans."
Write a different of onions and dead baby
Knock knock! who's there? baby! baby who? do u want to eat this baby that i have prepared? no thanks i already ate.
How do you stop a baby from drowning? pt. 2
-Harpoon it.
How do you stop a baby from drowning?
-Lift up your foot.
My mom asked my doctor, "Why is my unvaccinated baby crying?" The doctor replied, "He's going through a Mid-life Crisis
what has 4legs, than 3 legs, than 2 legs, than 1 leg, than no legs
a baby you cut one off each time
What's better than 5 baby's in one dumpster.
1 baby in 5 dumpster.
What do you call an infant with no legs?
GROUND BEEF
a Woman delivers a baby. The doctor takes the baby, and throws it, smashing around the hospital room, drop-kicking it, etc. The mother starts freaking out, being held back by nurses, begging “WHYYYY!!??”. The doctor holds the baby upside down by the ankle and says “I’m just fucking with you, it was born dead”.
What do you get when you throw a baby into the wheat thresher?
An erection.
My Infant drew on the walls today, but I don’t know how to punish them. So I think I’ll sleep on it.
What is the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
I take off my boots when I jump on a trampoline.
Q: what is the difference between a pizza and a baby? A: the pizza does not scream when you put it in the oven.
What is red bubbling and scratching at a window, A baby in the microwave.
Most people smother babies with love. I smother them with pillows
What's worse than finding 10 babies in 10 dumpsters?
Finding 1 baby in 10 dumpsters.
