Humans jokes
I'm a human.
Where is the most dangerous place for a human being to be?
In the womb of a woman who wants to abort her unborn baby. 😢
I knew the human race made mistakes, but you're the worst I've seen so far...
What is the difference between a human and a tree?
And walk, walk home, and...
Mom, how were hoomans made? Son, it’s because Adam and Eve were brought down by God and made babies!
Dad, how were hoomans made? Son, us humans evolved from monkeys!
Mom, Dad said hoomans were evolved from monkeys, is that true? Oh son, (ruffles smol man’s hair) your dad was telling you his side of the family, and I was telling my side :)
Papyrus was playing with the human, but then Papyrus fell and he broke the cell bone of the human.
What do you call an emo kid with light-up shoes? A human chandelier.
According to all known laws of aviation,
there is no way a bee should be able to fly.
Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.
The bee, of course, flies anyway
because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.
Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little.
Barry! Breakfast is ready!
Coming!
Hang on a second.
Hello?
- Barry? - Adam?
- Can you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up.
Looking sharp.
Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those.
Sorry. I'm excited.
Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son.
A perfect report card, all B's.
Very proud.
Ma! I got a thing going here.
- You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me!
- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye!
Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house!
What did a tree do for a human rights day at a tree?
I had no time today after a night with you today, but you walk away.
What is the difference between the human and a human and walk home walk and walk walk home and walk walk home from school?
Have you heard about the animal that was made of a human hand?
It's an ARMadillo.
How are humans and computers different? A human doesn't have trouble shooting.
What’s the difference between a bird and a human?
“We don’t eat with our peckers.”
What was Michael Jackson's answer to the parents of the little boys who were left with him when asked why does he do it that way? Tell them that it's human nature.
Humans and sharks have something in common: the great ones are always white.
What happens when a computer thinks it knows better than a human?
Ask Boeing.
While I was out shopping, I tripped in a store and a lady would not stop staring at me. For fun, I said, "Sorry! It's been a while since I've possessed a body." She looked horrified.
Dads are like boomerangs... I hope!
Son: Dad, why is my name Experience? Dad: Son, Experience is the name we give our mistakes.
You won't eat a human, so why eat meat? Bold of you to presume I won't eat a person.
What is the difference between a human and human rights, and a tree tree, and a house that has to?
What is the difference between the human rights act of a home from school and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk?
Yo mama so fricking ugly, she made humans to extinct.