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Https Jokes

My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away.

Credit To: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCTdZUCSiqNBBWzF398ab09Q

Today at the bank, an old lady asked me to help check her balance. So I pushed her over.

Credit To: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCTdZUCSiqNBBWzF398ab09Q

Mother, “Johnny, if you keep being this naughty, you’ll get kids who will be very naughty to you!”

Johnny, “Oh mom, you just betrayed yourself there, didn’t you?”

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How many degrees does it take to change ice into boiling water? 199, because, the difference between -100 and +100 is 199 (excluding the zero, because it's not real and it doesn't exist because it's not real). Get? https://youtu.be/XZQOjp0i35A?t=333

A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: ‘What the hell was that all about?’

Read more: https://metro.co.uk/2015/11/26/the-ten-funniest-jokes-ever-according-to-science-5527698/?ito=cbshare

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Have a sink in your house? Eat it. Have a mouse in your house? Kill it. Have a child in your house? M I C R O W A V E I T .

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just kidding now watch this video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y5tjtUFL0j4

If the grinch was an average white thotty b.... girl: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V6LmcrJq6oo

If the grinch was an average black girl: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WYzLo8vjSqI&has_verified=1

<img src="http://media.syracuse.com/news/photo/2016/08/03/boeing-c-32bjpg-ba41bd1bac5ece9c.jpg" alt="Image result for a white plane"/> i guess this is pretty plane i am sorry i am just winging it wow i guess these jokes haven't taken of Wow i just landed that one