Home jokes
I was bullying an orphan, then I said, "What, you gonna run home and cry to your mom?"
Teacher makes 1 kid recite the ABCs and the other count to 10.
Teacher: You can kill 2 birds with 1 stone.
Little Johnny goes home and throws a rock at two birds. One dies. He gives his dad a concussion from the rock hitting his head.
Johnny at school: You can kill a bird and give a man a concussion.
Two boys came home for dinner late, and their mother asked, "Where have you boys been?" One of them replied with, "We were all over the neighborhood, we're mailmen now." Their snobby teen sister said, "Well, you're not real mailmen, real mailmen use real letters." Then one of the boys said, "Actually, we used real letters, we found a whole box of them under your bed."
My mum said not to walk the streets because I won't find home the next day. I was an orphan.
Why do orphans love foster homes?
Because they actually have a home.
I wish my dad was home. I haven’t seen him since the shot of 2008.
I come in from work to see my wife dead on the sofa. As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of a dick fuck does that!
I made a website for orphans.
Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a home page.
I think people should date orphans, because their parents are never home.
Alright, so I have a few orphan jokes. I'm gonna put them all in one message.
Why can't orphans be gay? They have no one to call "daddy."
Why can't orphans go on a field trip? Parent signature: ______
New teacher: I used to be an orphan as a kid. Students: hahaha Teacher: Is anyone missing? Students: No one, just your parents.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They kept calling everyone "daddy."
Why do orphans have the iPhoneX? Because it has no home button.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
Even if you do burn down an orphanage, it's not gonna matter. It's not like they have homes.
Why are blinds called blinds?
Because when they aren’t closed, they are blinding!
Kid: Imagine being an orphan!
Parents: Look who's talking, not you 'cause you ain't got no one to talk to! *vanishes*
Kid: WAIT, WHAT!
Why do orphans always get an iPhone X?
Because it doesn’t have a home button.
Kid: Where do I put this paper?
Teacher: I already said go ask your neighbors.
Kid: Ok. *Walks home to his neighbor's house*
Kid: Hey neighbor, I didn't know where to put this paper, and my teacher said to ask you. Do you know?
Neighbor: No, sorry, I don't.
Kid: Okay, bye! *Kid walks back to school.*
Kid: Teacher, my next-door neighbor didn't know.
Teacher: Ugh, you went home?!
Kid: Yes, you told me to!
Teacher: I meant at school!
Kid: Ohhhhhh!
Teacher: Duh!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home plate is.
Why do orphans hate school? Because of homework.
"Jack and Jill went home because he was sick because of the virus in town, gave him a frown, and his arms were pricked."
Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they can't find home.