Hes jokes
Q: Why does Michael Jackson live in a Barbie world?
A: ♫He's made of plastic, it's fantastic!♪
Why can't Kobe go shopping?
He's dead.
Your friend lost his left arm, and after getting out of the hospital, you ask him if he’s OK. He says, "Yeah, I’m all RIGHT."
Why was the cow afraid?
Because he's a coward!
Why did Harry fall out of the boat?
Because he's hooked!
Why?
Killua is hot, why?
He's gay.
One day I'm walking and I saw Josh B. He's sucking balls and Marco jump[s], and we got [an] earthquake, and I say, "Yamate."
Why does the owl 🦉 have a lot of friends?
Because he’s a hoot.
Chuck Norris is...
What? You don't need to know what he is. He's just, Chuck.
Did you hear about the guy whose left side was cut off? He's all right now.
Why did the rapper refuse to write a diss track?
He didn’t want to start beef, he’s VEGAN.
I would stop bullying the orphan kid, what's he gonna do? Cry to his mommy?
Why can't the cheetah play hide and seek? Because he's always spotted.
What do you call James Bond when he’s taking a bath?
Bubble 07.
My mom asked my doctor, "Why is my unvaccinated baby crying?"
The doctor replied, "He's going through a midlife crisis."
A man who thinks he's funny but is actually a transvestite/transformer.
My boyfriend thinks he’s hilarious.
Him: How do you break things?
Me: You break things up.
Him: Okay.
Me: Is everything okay?
Him: We’re a twig. We’re breaking up.
Kate: Can we have a threesome?
Trevor: Sure.
The lights go off and Trevor starts doing what he's supposed to be doing, and then he feels something going up his back end. He goes to punch the person behind him, but then he turns on the light, and it was Kate behind him, and he's been fucking the guy the whole time.
I had to take my pet octopus to the vet yesterday.
Oh, don't worry, he's okay now.
But the vet charged me six quid.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
It doesn't matter, he's dead.