What’s the difference between Kendrick Lamar and an orphan?
He has family ties.
Hes Jokes
The first child, Daisy, asks her mother why she is named Daisy. The mother said, "That's because a daisy fell on your head when you were born."
The second child, Raindrop, asked why he is named Raindrop, and the mother said, "That's because a drop of rain fell on your head when you were born."
Then the third child, Cinderblock, said, "fxg,kxf dsdsvtg,hjer,btjh,rbtsvikvsdtxde43f."
What did the Indian say when he bumped into someone else?
"Sari."
Why can't an orphan ever be a criminal?
Because he isn't wanted.
Why did the retard cross the road?
He never made it!
Why did the orphan cry when he got back home?
Because he did not have one.
The guy who discovered milk... What did he do with the cow?!
There was a fish looking for a great meal. He looks above him and sees a fly. He thought, "If that fly drops six inches, I would have a meal." Long story short, a pussy gets wet.
A king ordered to execute a gay man.
The gay man came and said, "Please don't behead me, have pity!" The king replied, "I will have pity because I will impale you, let you enjoy your last moments."
What does Michael Jackson like to drink? Tea-he-he.
My friend said that gay people existed 10 years ago.
He can tell the future.
When you tell an Asian kid it’s raining cats and dogs and he’s like, “Just open your mouth and close your eyes!”
I stole my friend's amnesia medication the other day, he was pretty pissed.
But I reminded him of the age-old mantra: "Forgive and forget!"
How did the cookie 🍪 feel when he was dunked in milk?
Batter.
So recently I hit an orphan with a 2x4, and he started crying. What's he gonna do? Tell his family? XD
I saw a kid crying, sitting on the sidewalk, and I asked him where his parents were. He then cried even more. God, I love working at the orphanage.
Yesterday I saw an orphan kid playing GTA and told him he can't get 5 stars because he ain't wanted.
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his wife?
He wiped.
I went up to the deaf kid and said, "I’m going to punch you in 3, 2, 1." And he ended up with a broken nose, and I said, "You should have listened to me!"
There is this little boy, and he gets in the shower with his mom and looks up and says, "Mommy, what are those?"
She replies with, "These are my headlights."
He looks down and says, "Mommy, what's that?" She says, "That's my garage."
So he gets out of the shower and gets in with his dad and looks down and says, "What is that?" The dad says, "This is my snake."
Later that night, he wakes up in the middle of the night and screams, "Mommy, Mommy, turn off your headlights and close your garage. Daddy's snake is trying to get in!"
