Helicopter

Helicopter jokes

Audio

    • They finally released the audio recording from the black box in Kobe’s helicopter.

    Apparently when the helicopter caught fire, Kobe was sitting right next to the only fire extinguisher. You could hear everyone screaming for him to put out the fire, but he couldn’t figure out how to use it. They begged and pleaded for him to give the extinguisher to anyone else... the last thing you hear is Kobe saying “I’d rather die than pass it!”

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    • Accident

    • What did Kobe Bryant and Josef Vanicek have in common?

    They both won a trophy at least once, Vanicek a 1x Stanley Cup champion with the Carolina Hurricanes, and they also both crashed and burned in a helicopter or airplane.

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    • Child

    • The boss wondered why one of his most valued employees was absent, but had not phoned in.

    Needing to have an urgent work problem resolved, he dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted by a child's whisper, "Hello."

    "Is your Mummy home?" he asked.

    "Yes," whispered the small voice.

    "May I talk with her?"

    The child whispered, "No."

    Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Daddy there?"

    "Yes."

    "May I talk with him?"

    Again the small voice whispered, "No."

    Hoping there was someone with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, "Is anyone else there?"

    "Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman."

    Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?"

    "No, he's busy," whispered the child.

    "Busy doing what?"

    "Talking to the ambulancemen and the Fireman," came the whispered answer.

    Growing more worried as he heard a loud noise through the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked, "What is that noise?"

    "A helicopter," answered the whispering voice.

    "What is going on there?" demanded the boss, now truly apprehensive.

    Again, whispering, the child answered, "The search team just landed a helicopter."

    Alarmed, confused, and a little frustrated, the boss asked, "What are they searching for?"

    Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled giggle..."Me!"

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    • Helicopter memes

    Crash

    • What's the difference between the 44 out of the 45 people who died in the Yaroslavl crash and the nine people who died in the helicopter crash?

    Only one was ever famous. Vasicek and Kobe Bryant were the champions.

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    • Chopper

    • Helicopter, helicopter, Kobe Bryant in my chopper, Sitting next to burning daughter, Lots of smoke and little laughter.

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    • Plane

    • What is the difference between a plane and a helicopter?

    A plane hits a building, but a helicopter hits the floor.

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    • Chopper

    • A chopper full of white people is also called a helicopter.

    A chopper full of black people is called a hellacopter.

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    • Trump

    • Trump and two of his friends are stranded on an island with no internet connection and no way of getting home.

    As they frantically run around the island trying to get a signal so Trump can call his private helicopter to come and pick them up, Trump's wig falls off and lands on a magical lamp, from which suddenly appears a genie.

    As Trump replaces his wig, the genie announces that he will grant each man one wish for freeing him. The men stop to confer. The first one says he will wish for a plane to rescue him, the second wishes for a boat to rescue him, and they tell Trump to wish for a helicopter to rescue him.

    Trump, being Trump, nods and says yes, but he wasn't really listening. Then they approach the genie. The first one of Trump's friends wishes for a plane to rescue him, as agreed. The second one of Trump's friends wishes for a boat to rescue him, as agreed. Then Trump is left all alone, but instead of wishing for a helicopter to rescue him, as agreed, he says, "Aww, I'm lonely now. I wish both my friends were here with me!"

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