Health jokes
What’s the hardest part to eat of a vegetable?
The wheelchair.
What do you call a skeleton with no bones? A boneless boy.
A pedophile brings his eight-year-old daughter to the doctor's office. The doctor asked her if she would like some candy? Her father replies, "Please, no more candy for her. I gave her enough today."
My dick itches.
Did you hear about the guy who got his left side chopped off?
Well, he’s all right now!
What do you call 1 normal kid and 2 retarded kids smoking weed?
Pot roast.
We wrote letters to a kid with cancer.
My letter read, "It's a bumpy road, but soon you will have a straight path."
People didn't realize it was meant for his heart monitor. Lol.
We wrote letters to a kid with cancer.
My letter read, "It's a bumpy road, but soon you will have a straight path."
People didn't realize it was meant for his heart monitor.
We wrote letters to a kid with cancer.
My letter read, "It's a bumpy road, but soon you will have a straight path." People didn't realize it was meant for his heart monitor.
We wrote letters to a kid with cancer. My letter read, "It's a bumpy road, but soon you will have a straight path." People didn't realize it was meant for his heart monitor.
A player in Baldi's Basics says, "Why are you bald?"
Baldi responds, "Well, I have cancer."
The player says, "Oh, good for you!"
So I made a simple cancer joke on Roblox with my friend, and then both her dumb-ass friends were like, "OMG WHY WOULD U SAY DAT? YOUR HORRIBLE!!" That pissed me off. Like damn woman, it's not like I said, "IF PEOPLE IN YOUR FAMILY DIED FROM CANCER THAT MEANS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY ARE ALL DUMB-ASSES." If anything they are actually dumb asses but hey. Also they can't talk. They don't know that I'm abused everyday at home and pressured to get good grades or else I'd get my head bashed against a wall till there is blood. So if they are reading this, SUCK MY ASS BITCH.
What did the lungs say to the cigar?
"You take my breath away..."
What do you call a bad amputation?
A rip-off.
What's the difference between fruit and a freshly killed corpse?
I don't eat the fruit.
Why is there air conditioning at a hospital?
To keep the vegetables cool and fresh.
Yum!
What happens when a skeleton does not laugh at your pun?
Looks like someone's funny bone is broken. 😁
What do you call a bunch of retarded kids in a swimming pool?
Vegetable soup.
Stage 4 cancer is like a woman. You can’t beat it, but if you do, she’ll probably come back again.
I bought shoes from a drug dealer. I know he LCD'd them and all, but I have been tripping all day.
Why are hospitals always freezing?
They need to keep the vegetables cold.