Hawking jokes
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He lost internet connection.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
"Windows 10 shutting down."
Why was Stephen Hawking's wife mad at him?
She caught him having an affair with his shoulder.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
They unplugged the wifi.
What college can Stephen Hawking not attend?
"Stand" Ford University. :3
Memes
What’s the difference between Hitler and Steven Hawking?
Nothing, they're both dead, one painted the walls and the other committed suicide by pressing ALT + F4.
Stephen Hawking is so lucky to go to heaven.
Oh never mind, here comes the stairway.
So Stephen Hawking walked into a bar - just kidding.
Stephen Hawking once stood up to bow down to Chuck Norris.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite toy?
Hot Wheels.
When Stephen Hawking found out about physics, he was speechless.
You wanna know who didn't kick the bucket? Stephen Hawking didn't; nor did he bite the dust.
Why did Steven Hawking only tell one-liners?
Because he couldn't do standup.
Some say Stephen Hawking was a genius, but I never heard him say anything intelligent.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite food? Microchips.
When Stephen Hawking was feeling hungry, he used to call in to his local PC World for a megabyte and some microchips.
Is Stephen Hawking under warranty? If so, can I bring him back to Currys PC World?
A brunette, a red-head, and a blonde are being chased by bandits. They are chased to the edge of a cliff and a genie appears.
"I will help you escape," says the genie, "say what you wish to turn into, and you will become that thing."
The brunette jumps off the cliff and says "Hawk." She turns into a hawk and flies away. The red-head says "Falcon." She turns into a falcon and flies away. Now the blonde is alone and the bandits are getting closer. She makes her decision and backs up, then runs toward the cliff. And...she trips and says "Crap."
The End
Why is Stephen Hawking good at skateboarding? Because he's always on the ramps.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on Mars? Mars Rover.