Hawking jokes
Why did Stephen Hawking die? He didn't pay his electricity bills.
What does Stephen Hawking say after sex? That was wheely good.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo? Head 'n Shoulders.
A brunette, a red-head, and a blonde are being chased by bandits. They are chased to the edge of a cliff and a genie appears.
"I will help you escape," says the genie, "say what you wish to turn into, and you will become that thing."
The brunette jumps off the cliff and says "Hawk." She turns into a hawk and flies away. The red-head says "Falcon." She turns into a falcon and flies away. Now the blonde is alone and the bandits are getting closer. She makes her decision and backs up, then runs toward the cliff. And...she trips and says "Crap."
The End
Why did Stephen Hawking's wife get annoyed with him?
He had an affair with Alexa.
Memes
What noise does Stephen Hawking make when he dies? Windows shutting down theme tune.
How does Stephen Hawking take a shit? He logs out.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo? Head and Shoulders.
Why does Stephen Hawking do one-liners? -- Because he can't do stand up.
Do you know Mike Hawk? No, who is he? Mike Hawk in your MOUTH!
Stephen Hawking would be a bad Pokemon.
He'd always be paralyzed, and his only move would be tackle!
Oh no, I feel bad for Stephen Hawking. He can’t get up the stairway to Heaven.
Why did Steven Hawking's snot not go to heaven?
Because there is no ramp to heaven.
Stephen Hawking went on a date and came back with a broken leg. I can't believe she stood him up.
I guess you could say Stephen Hawking is a dead meme.
Stephen Hawking must have got a MacBook Pro. End of battery.
I was both shocked and amazed to hear Stephen Hawking kicked the bucket.
What do you call someone smart and dead?
Stephen Hawking...
Stephen Hawking isn't dead, he's just can't walk to the shop and get new batteries. 🙄
How is Stephen Hawking so smart? He uploads it to his software.