Hawking jokes
When Stephen Hawking was asked why he was instantly attracted to his new girlfriend, he said, "It's simple, she pushes all the right buttons."
Why does Stephen Hawking do one-liners? Because he can't do stand-up.
What does Stephen Hawking have in common with a bull? They both charge.
Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house? No, he hasn't either.
It’s sad because with all these mean jokes Stephen hawkings can’t even Stand up for himself
How does Stephen Hawking charge his computer?
How does Stephen Hawking have sex? Keyboard sex!
Stephen Hawking went on a date and came back with a broken leg. I can't believe she stood him up.
Why does Stephen Hawking always say he's got so many bitches?
Because he is never around Siri.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on Mars? Mars Rover.
Stephen Hawking and his wife Siri’s favorite place to eat is Meals on Wheels!
What do you call Stephen Hawking's wife? Siri.
What happens when you say, "Hey Siri?"
Stephen Hawking answers.
Why is Stephen Hawking going to hell? Because it's a stairway to heaven, not a ramp!
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo? Head and Shoulders.
Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Oh, wait, he doesn’t walk.
Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house?
No, neither has he.
What's Stephen Hawking's wife called? Wendy.
Did you hear that Stephen Hawking wrote a new book? It's called "Around The House in Eighty Days."
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite lunch? Eggs and shoulders.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite meal?
His shoulder.