Have jokes
Do you have a sunburn, or are you just always this hot?
What do tofu and a dildo have in common? They're both meat substitutes.
Have you ever had a friend who masturbated many times? I had one who did a lot, but he had no imagination... when he masturbated, he imagines his hand.
Why are women like KFC? After you finish with the thigh and the breasts, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.
Can [I] ask your sister how you are going for Christmas? And [to clarify,] I have internet.
They say making and having friends comes with some benefits. I guess you could say I have friends with benefits.
Why do orphans play Minecraft? Because they have no home.
Denki: Hey, Mineta, I have a joke for you.
Mineta: Go on.
Denki: Uraraka's booty.
Mineta: I don't get it.
Denki: Exactly.
Mineta: ^cries T_T^
Why do orphans have an iPhone X?
Because there is no home button.
You must have a good power supply, because you're easy to turn on!
I was given my electronics test today. Turns out it was given to me 'cause I have the same name as someone who got 54/59. I actually got my hopes up, too.
What does a bullet and milk have in common? They both take out your dad.
When I hit a home run, I finally felt what it was like to have a home.
What did the icicle say to the snow?
"Why do you have to be so soft?"
I wish my lawn was emo, so I would not have to cut it, it would cut itself.
My dad and I have been playing hide and seek.
It's been 15 years and I still haven't found him.
Have you heard about the smart traveler? He's clearly going places.
Me: *looks at person's hand* This guy doesn't have fingers!
Random person with no fingers: Why do you have to point that out?
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
He didn't have the guts.
I did have a good night, and I did a good night, and I had to walk around the house.