Hate

Hate jokes

School

  • I hate school. I mean, why can't you pull out a 12 gauge and shoot everyone, including the teachers?! This generation is too soft, man.

    Stephen Hawking

  • Heard Stephen Hawking is in a new movie and that the theme tune is absolutely banging. Think the opening line goes something like, “They see me rolling, they hating.”

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  • Newfoundland

  • A down-on-his-luck Newfoundlander takes a job in Toronto. He hates every minute of it. The housing is overpriced, the traffic a bottleneck. Frustrated, he starts saving every penny until he can buy a car to go home to the outport.

    Eventually someone takes pity on him and offers to sell him a car with no reverse for fifty bucks.

    "I takes it!" the Newfie replies, "because I don't intends on coming back anyway."

  • 0
  • Exercise

  • How do you know that Americans hate exercise?

    9/11. How else do you explain hundreds of them jumping to their death rather than taking the stairs?

  • 1
  • Road

  • Why did the emu cross the road? Because it was the chicken's day off. Yeah, I hate myself, man.

    Girl

  • It's this girl named Deaf, what a weird name, but I know that 'cause I was ear hustling.

    But anyway, everytime I call her, she doesn't answer. I wanna clap some cheeks tonight, how could she hate me when she don't know me?

    Class

  • I've got not much of anything to be honest.

    Been in special classes in school.

    Not liked by people.

    Only relationship I've ever had and she cheated on me.

    31 years old and never had sex, pathetic.

    Not very smart.

    Don't look good.

    Hate myself more than anything.

    Been a failure at everything in life.

    Probably be alone forever.

    People treat me like crap.

    Can't do anything right.

    And the list goes on and on.

    So the question is why haven't I killed myself yet? The answer is, I forget. I'm a extreme procrastinator, keep just putting it off because I'll probably just fuck it up anyway.

    Ketchup

  • Sans: I like eating ketchup, don't believe me? It's ASRIEL as it gets!

    UT Sans to UT pap: You FORGHETTIE the spaghetti!!!

    Ink sans: umm lust? That's INKAPPROPRIATE!

    Fell sans: I hate these double standards...if you burn a body at a crematorium you're doing "a good job," do it at home and your "destroying evidence."

    Error sans: Every time you make a typo, the errorists win.

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  • Kanye

  • Hey guys, I just wanna say what happened to Kanye; he is one of my favorite rappers, and he’s going through a hard time. I don’t see why people can’t just spread love and kindness like me💕

    I think that Kanye was right to say what he said. I completely support him, and I don’t understand why people hate on him for using his 1st amendment, and Yeezy should be sued for it.

    Quote of the day: Love bests hate as for hate is the killer of friendships - Collin Kaepernick