Guy jokes
How do you call Doom guy that drinks Monster Zero? Boom guy!
A friend sits across from me at class so I asked if she wants to hang out sometimes. She said yes, so I called her over to my house, and that's the day I found out she was a guy.
The moral of the story: don't try to fuck your friends.
Sup guys, how are you?
So, two people are on a date and the guy says, "Wow, you are so beautiful!"
Then the girl says, "You just want to have sex!"
Then the guy adds, "SMART TO!"
What’s a guy with Tourette’s favorite app to use? Tiktok.
*walks into a comedy night club* Owner: "You're doing standup tonight, right?" Noob Joker (you): "Yes, I am!" Owner: "Get onto the stage." Me: *walks up stage* Owner: "This is the standup comedian noobpro." Me: "Hey guys, how about some Donald Trump?" Crowd: *RUNS*
Did you hear about the guy that dipped his balls in glitter?
Pretty nuts, huh?
Why were condoms invented? So gay guys can have sword fights.
That awkward moment when you thought the guy was a pretty good magician, and only then realize he simply suffers from leprosy.
Three men walk into a bar. The 1st says, "Hey, how's it going?" The 2nd one says, "Great!" But then the 3rd man says, "Hello, where did my wife go? I swear she was just here!" What happened to the 3rd guy's wife?
If you are a big fan of me, go to the movie and I kill the bad guys. If you don't, I will be mad and I will be sonic.exe lol.
What do queer guys call hemorrhoids? Speed bumps!
What did the fat guy say to the skinny guy?
Fat guy: Does this look fat on me?
Skinny guy: No, I don’t think it’s that.
Fat guy: Thinking.
People are fighting in a war, and a man gets hit four times in the arm and says, "'Tis but a scratch!"
And the other guy, looking at him in shock, says, "A scratch? Your arm is off your body!"
Guys, I know this is kinda weird, but everyone who wants to... Put your name and your age in the comment section. Not address though because that would not be good for creepers... Lol I am Lucy and I am 15 years old. What about you guys? :D
Colder than the conversation between a fat guy and a Super Model...
The two biggest dyslexic guy lies: "My check is in your mouth," and "I won't come in your mailbox."
What do you call a guy with a big dick that likes to eat fish?
Long John Silvers or Captain D's.
Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a soda can?
He was lucky it was a soft drink!
To you, Iron Man may seem cool or awesome, but to me, he is pretty ironic.