Guy jokes
Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a soda can?
He was lucky it was a soft drink!
What do you call two guys fighting over a slut?
Tug of whore.
What is the difference between the pizza guy and my dad?
The pizza guy shows up when you call him.
Did you hear about the guy who drank invisible ink? He's at the hospital waiting to be seen.
Guy: Hey, Siri, I failed my final exams, can you cheer me up?
Siri: What’s the difference between you and your grandma? Your grandma passed!
Have you ever wondered why you never see a gay guy in a wheelchair?
It’s hard to become a vegetable when you’re already a fruit.
Did you hear about the guy who was afraid of hurdles? He got over it.
What do you call a rapper who's also a PILOT?
Fly Guy
I just read that someone in New York gets stabbed every 52 seconds. Poor guy!
Guy: You won't eat a human, so why do you eat meat?
Other Guy: It is bold of you to think I won't eat a human.
Teacher: "Do you guys want to get in trouble?"
Kid named Teacher: *
Nothing makes a guy happier than when his girlfriend says, “Go and lock the door first...”
Who's the most popular guy at the nudist colony? The one who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen doughnuts.
Jeff crosses the US border.
The second he crosses into the USA, a guy comes up with a gun.
Jeff: "That's what I was expecting."
"Did you guys make sure Stephen was plugged in?"
Random guy: Come on, Bin Laden, time is ticking. Get it, ticking. OK, I'll leave.
Need an arch? I Noah guy.
To you, Iron Man may seem cool or awesome, but to me, he is pretty ironic.
Colder than the conversation between a fat guy and a Super Model...
The two biggest dyslexic guy lies: "My check is in your mouth," and "I won't come in your mailbox."