Great jokes
"How was your day?"
"It was great."
"What was so great about it?"
"I saw a puppy."
"Awww."
"And I ran over it :)"
My great grandpa killed Hitler.
Guys, you shouldn't joke about 9/11.
My great-uncle died that day. Best damn pilot in Iraq.
With great depression comes great antidepressants.
Teacher: Great! You’re studying in break time!
Student: Thank you. I heard that it is good to study before sleep.
Sex is like pizza.
When it’s hot, it’s great.
When it’s cold, it’s still pretty good.
Do you know that no one finds Hitler a great guy?
But he really saved the History Channel.
My mom told me that her doctor told her personally that she had to keep herself isolated because she has a few new symptoms that are going around, and those symptoms are that she has big titties, a sweet pussy, and a great ass.
A man goes to the doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world.
Doctor says: "Treatment is simple. The great clown - Pagliacci - is in town. Go see him. That should pick you up."
Man bursts into tears, says "But doctor... I am Pagliacci."
I took my mother-in-law out yesterday morning,
It's great being a sniper.
People were deciding how to punish a terrible criminal, and one man came up with a great idea.
He sat him in a movie theater with no food at all and made him watch a 12 hour documentary about the country Hungary.
I once had a pet snake, exactly 3.14 meters.
He was a great πthon.
What do sharks and people have in common? The great ones are white.
Hi guys, I just found this website. I got emailed by joshisboss or something. Have a great day! 👍
A man goes into a job interview and sits down.
The interviewer is looking over his resume and says, "I see here that there's a 4-year gap on your resume. What were you doing?"
The man says, "Oh, that was when I went to Yale!"
The interviewer is impressed and says, "That's great! You're hired!"
The man smiles. "Really? I'm so glad, because I really need this Yob."
Bro, stop. You guys are saying the same jokes over and over. If you're gonna tell a 9/11 joke, just go laugh about the Great Thumps.
Yo mama so fat it took her 3 seconds to cross the Great Wall of China.
Man 1: I-I ran my mom over to get a stupid book.
Man 2: Aww, books aren't that bad. I'm sure she thinks you're a great son considering she can't drive anymore.
Man 1: She was in the road, and I was rushing to get the last copy of this book. She can't drive or do anything anymore.
I hate when people make jokes about the Twin Towers.
My dad died on 9/11. He was a great pilot.
I don't like it when people make jokes about 9/11, because we lost 19 great patriots that day.