Orange you glad you are not a comedian.
Iḿ glad were all going virtul so I can cuss in front of my class and blame it on my stupid siblings
apple apple apple apple apple orange you glad I didn't say apple again?
In Israel, they chop convicted rapists' balls off. Sure glad I don't live in Israel.
Orange you glad to see me?
A person laughs everyday. "Man," they say, "I'm glad I'm not an egg, otherwise I'd just CRACK MYseLf uP!
Adopted kid
Hey Alex what are you doing?
Alex
Nothing just playing my game anyways you know you can call me dad.
Adopted kid
OK dad Alex
Alex
OH COME ON my game I’m winning LETS GO
Adopted kid
I’m so glad I have a mom
A man goes into a job interview and sits down. The interviewer is looking over his resume and says, "I see here that there's a 4-year gap on your resume. What were you doing?" The man says, "Oh, that was when I went to Yale!" The interviewer is impressed and says, "That's great! You're hired!" The man smiles. "Really? I'm so glad, because I really need this Yob."
Once there were twins, Mark and Michael. Mark was the owner of an old boat. It so happened that Michael's wife died the same day that Mark's boat sank. A few days later, a kindly old woman saw Mark and mistook him for Michael. She said, "I'm sorry to hear about your loss. You must just feel terrible." Mark, thinking that she was talking about his boat, said, "Heck no. In fact, I'm sort of glad to be rid of her. She was a rotten old thing right from the beginning. Her bottom was all shriveled up and she smelled like old dead fish. She was always losing her water; she had a bad crack in the back and a pretty big hole in the front too. Every time I used her, her hole got bigger and she leaked like crazy. I guess what finally finished her off was when I rented her to these four guys looking for a good time. I warned them that she wasn't very good, but they wanted to use her anyhow. The fools tried to get in her all at once and she split right up the middle!" The old lady fainted.
Dad Sad Bad Rad Nad Tad Glad Clad Plaid Had
Aaron you glad i didn't make this joke?
Here are some skeleton jokes You know the average person tries to hard and works himself to the bone If that joke didn't tickle your funny bone i can give you a real humerous joke I used to play the trumpet now i play the xylo-bone im always happy nothing gets under my skin I made you some turkey for lunch Bone appetit Im glad i had you im no longer bonely Ive got a skele-ton of more jokes but i'm just giving you one more Did you hear about the skeleton ninja he was very skullful (skillful)
A man with a gun and a sword walks into a bar, sees a girl, and falls in love with her. Man: Hey, you are one beautiful girl. Will You be my girlfriend? Girl: No, because you have a gun and a sword. Man: But I am already in love with you. And then the man leaves to get the girl flowers and candy. The girl is glad that the has gone, until thirty minutes later, when he shows up again. Man: Here are some flowers for you, beautiful girl. And the girl throws the flowers in his face, and then everyone in the bar laughs, even the bartender. Man: And here is some candy. And the girl throws the candy in his face, and everyone in the bar laughs again, and some teenagers walking down the street see it as well, and then they start laughing too. One of the teenagers says "Hahaha, that is so funny. Seeing a man give a girl candy, and the girl throwing it in his face to show him that she hates him." Girl: I hate you, ugly man! Man: Bartender, can I get some candy for my girl? The bartender laughs when he hears that, and then he says "Are you crazy? We don't serve-" And then the man shoots the bartender with his gun, and stabs him with his sword. An old man walking down the street can't believe what he just saw. So he calls the police to arrest the man who killed the bartender. 999 Service Guy: 999, what's your emergency? Old man: I just walked past a bar, and I saw a man shoot and stab the bartender. Can you please get the police to arrest him? Tell them he is the man with a gun and a sword I his bag. 999 Service Guy: Okay, no worries. 1 Hour later, the first man tries to dance the tango with the girl, and the girl kicks him in the leg, and then he tries to kiss her, and she punches him in the face. Guy sitting at a table in the bar: That man is crazy. Trying to kiss a girl who hates him. And the police show up. First Policeman: Which man has a gun and a sword in his bag? The girl points to the man and says "This man." Second Policeman: Let's arrest him. Man: No, wait! I can explain. Third Policeman: Get in the back of the car. When the police get to the Police Station with the man, the first policeman says "You will stay in prison for 10 years." One week later, the man breaks the bars and escapes prison. The police see him and run after him. Third Policeman: Come back here! The man doesn't listen, and he keeps running. So the police shoot him and he dies. And instead of saying rest in peace on his gravestone, it says rest in pieces.
Um honey I'm glad your done but um WHO KICKED OUR BABY'S ASS?! I"M PRETTY SURE FACES DON"T BEND THAT WAY!!
knock knock who's there banana banana who knock knock who's there banana banana who knock knock who's there orange orange who orange you glad i did not say banana ha ha
Glad to present you wood clock https://olegon.ru/clock/
Why are you so bonely my friend I am at least glad that you are not boneless
When you send a dick pic and she sends one back I'm glad mine is the biggest, so I get to fuck my dad again
I know people don’t really like cat puns, but mine are PURRety good. Did you CATch that one? No? Because you are in a bad mood? You should WISKER those feelings away. We should PAWnder ways to fix your mood. Just remember to keep CLAWing at the problem. I am glad I can help MEW.
"Wanna hear a joke?" "Sure." "You SURE will be glad when this dad joke's over." "That was pretty DAD."
