your walking into a bar and you see 2 younger kids around 18 you call the manager to have them removed but no one came down. later that night you see the 2 18 year olds 1 was a girl and the other was a boy so you call the manager down no one came again. you confront them and tell them to leave, but one turns around and hits you. you are nocked out on the floor. when you wake up there is a hard feeling in your a** you turn ur head around and there is an autistic girl with a strap on in ur a** going fool on hard.
is your refrigerator running ''yeah i guess'' well you better go catch it haha im girl it funny
Son - Dad, I've been expelled from school for having sex with a girl in my class.
Dad - Son, that's the 2nd school this year! Maybe teaching isn't for you!
A guy walks into a bar. He sees a hot girl. He walks up to her and says, "You're getting laid tonight." She replies, "What are you, some sort of psychic?" He says, "No, I'm just stronger than you."
When I was born the doctors said, "it's a boy!" Then when they went to cut the umbilical cord, they cut the wrong thing. Then they said, "Oh, it's a girl."
Did you hear about the 100 centimeter girl?
I’d really like to meter.
Why was the new gamer mad when they were playing Overwatch?
Because gamer girl WAS ALREADY TRACER.
So my mom has hit me with a flip flop when i was bad and when i cheated on my girl right when the other girl came in a flip flop came flying in the room
A little girl and a little boy are taking a bath together when the little girl looks down and asks, "What's that?" The little boy says, "That's my little red race car." 10 minutes later, the boy looks down and asks, "What's that?" The little girl says, "That's my little red race car garage."
So later that night the boy asks the little girl if he can put his little red race car in her little red race car garage. She says yes, and they pull down their pants and the boy tries putting his little red race car in her garage, but it won't fit. Downstairs, the mother hears an ear-piercing scream and runs upstairs, flips on the lights, and sees blood on the floor. The mother asks, "What happened?" The little girl says, "We tried putting his car in my garage and it wouldn't fit, so I cut the back wheels off."
Highest level of insult by a girl by seeing a guy's dick: I can shit bigger logs than that thing of your's 🤣
I asked my girlfriend if she was a smoke alarm she said “ is it because I warned him when hottness came” I said “ no, you don’t shut up
A 6-year old told the class the first time she got aids, the teacher listened she said she scraped her knee the girl was sent to a asylum when she got out she was 20 she had aids
There was this guy asked a girl how much are your hand jobs $25k how much are your blowjobs $50k how much do you charge to have sex on the street? REPLY; i would if i had a pussy
According to all known laws of aviation,
there is no way a bee should be able to fly.
Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.
The bee, of course, flies anyway
because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.
Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little.
- That girl was hot. - She's my cousin!
Charizarding When you light a girls pubes on fire, put it out with your jizz then flap your arms and say "You don't have have enough badges to train me"
I was fucking this girl, and I started to make her cry. She mumbled things and squirmed, but I couldnt hear her through the gag I put in her mouth.
What's the difference between a prostitute and a drug dealer?
The prostitute can wash her crack and sell it again.
I will tell you a story. There was a fruit named Pear who was named Dyck. He one day met his friend Carrot, who was later killed after being stuck into some girl's vagina.
Pear then became very sadistic and no one loved him, and he became mentally fruit-pressed. One day he met a Banana named Harvey Weinstein, and they got married and had children who were all named Minion. Eventually, the rest of his family died, and Pear was left slowly rotting away. His last words were, "I have finally 'peared' the consequences of all my actions."
Girls are like rocks, the flat ones get skipped.
So I was in the car with my mom one time and we always joke about me being adopted (I am not) and Michael Jackson's song Billie Jean sounds like my name and so my mom says, as the song is playing, (my name) is not my daughter, she's just a girl who claims that I am her mum. Wow. *applauds for mother* Love you momma =)
