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What do orphans get at Xmas?
Lonely.
Customer: "Can I get this in a smaller size and a different color?"
Employee: "Ma'am, this is an adoption agency, you can't do that here!"
What do parents and dark humor have in common? Not everyone gets them.
Why did Michael Jackson love melted chocolate? Because he could pour it on his cock, then get a prepubescent boy to suck it off.
What do dark humor and food have in common?
Some get it, some don't.
What's a native chick say after sex?
"Get off me, Dad, you're crushing my smokes!"
What do parents and dark humor have in common? Some get it, and some don't.
What's the difference between an orphan and cotton?
One gets picked.
Who comes when an orphan gets married? They are allowed back in family restaurants, but when I go in alone, I'm not allowed. I have some parents, for God's sake!
I hope you get raped by a chimp in the forest
You and your sister always get into a fight and she says, "I don't care." Then you say right away, "About you!"
What does a Rubik's cube and a man's penis have in common?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
Guy, it was so weird yesterday. I saw a guy, and he kept repeating the same thing over and over. I hate people with dementia. I told my mom to get a new mirror, but she won’t listen to me. It’s almost like I said it like 20 times every time I say it.
Why do orphans play tennis?
Because it's the only love they get.
Why did the wetback cross the river? To get to the US.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
What will fall faster, an emo or an apple?
An apple, because the emo would get caught on the rope.
What do you get when you cross an alligator with a vest?
An investigator.
Why did the caretaker of the Twin Towers get sacked?
He left the landing lights on.
Where do orphans get stuff from?
The reject shop.