I wish my lawn was emo, because than it would cut itself.
What did the big flower say to the little flower? Hi, Bud
What's the difference between 911 and a Mexican gardener? One of them is an outside job
If I had a garden I would Put your tulips against My tulips.....🌷
The maid asked her boss, the wife, for a raise, and the wife was upset.
The wife asked "Why do you think you deserve a pay increase?"
Maid: "There are three reasons. The first is that I iron better than you."
Wife: "Who said that?"
Maid: "Your husband."
Wife: "Oh."
Maid: "The second reason is that I am a better cook than you."
Wife: "Who said that?"
Maid: "Your husband."
Wife: "Oh."
Maid: "The third reason is that I am better at sex than you."
Wife: "Did my husband say that as well?"
Maid: "No, the gardener did."
Wife: "So how much do you want?"
When you’re walking through the garden section at Walmart and you hear your grandpa screaming “They’re in the fucking trees!”
I was gardening and found a chest full of blood... i forgot i was in the cemetery
So I was digging up in the garden and I found some treasure I was gunna tell my wife when I remembered why I was digging in the garden
Why did the boy put a chicken 🐔 in his garden?
He wanted to grow an eggplant. 😂
My new leaf blower doesn't work. It Sucks.
Roses are red, flowers are pretty, I heard your mom has a nice pair of tittys.
What’s a Pedophiles Favorite type of garden
A KinderGarden
What is so similar about a concreate block and a garden They both make vegitables
if u were a vegetable u would be a cute-cumber
Adam and eve are going through the garden when Adam suddenly says, "What race are we?" Eve responds with, "Ask God, he will tell you." so adam goes over to a hill and asks, "God, what race are we?" God says, " You are what you are." Adam goes back to Eve and says, "We are white." Eve asks how he knew that. Adam responds with, "If we were black, he would have said 'you is what you is'."
Why does your grandma like gardening so much? Because she loves getting dirty down on her knees
how do u cut your grass without a lawnmower? - u dye it blue and it will cut itself
My friend came over to my house. He asked where my girlfriend was, and I told him she is in the garden. He said, "That's weird, I didn't see her." I said, " You have to dig a little."
There is a rich child and a poor child. The rich child invites the poor child to his house and shows him all the toys and tells him: Look at what a beautiful radio-controlled airplane I have it,but you don't have it because you are poor! The poor child answers:You're right it's very nice but i'have one thing that you don't have! The Rich child then invites him into the garden and shows him the swimming pool, the trampoline and all the other games that can be done outdoors and tells ti the pope child: looks that beautiful swimming pool I have is very big you don't have it because you are poor! and the poor child says: Beautiful is really beautiful! But one thing that you don't have. So the rich child feels bad he says: Wait but I'm rich, how is it possible? I have everything i want because I'm rich.Why you have something that I don't have? And the poor child says : I have cancer!
3 Europeans head to an island. They are captured by the island people. They are going to kill them and they plead. They grant them a chance to live. The island people tell them to grab a fruit from the tribe's garden and bring it back, then to follow the task at hand. The first guy brings back a peach. The island leader says, "Stick it up your ass. If you laugh, you die." The first guy shoves it up his ass and laughs, so they kill him. The second guy brings a grape, he does the same and laughs, making them kill him. The first two are in heaven together. "Peaches are fuzzy so I laughed. How the hell did you die? You had a grape!" says the first guy. The second guy replied,"It didn't tickle at all. I laughted at the sight the third guy was bringing over a pinapple."
