Funny

Funny jokes

I was on a website doing homework, and there was this funny a** commercial banner saying: "Eat a bag of Dick's!" It was the funniest sh*t ever!

There were 1 mom and 3 kids. The first kid comes up and asks, "Why is my name Daisy?" The mom says, "Because when you were born a daisy fell on your head." The second kid asks their mom, "Why is my name Butterfly?" The mom says, "Because when you were born a butterfly landed on your head." Then the third kid yells, "Ahjoejienfkef." The mom says, "Shut up, Brick!"

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    • If someone told me to bring up 9/11, they were trying to make a funny joke, but it didn't work.

    That one really *crashed and burned*.

    I KNOW IT'S MARCH, BUT I THOUGHT OF THIS!

    Jingle bells, jingle bells! OH GOD, SANTA FELL!

    I guess it's time for Mrs. Claus to go straight down to hell!

    Me, an orphan: *laughing at orphan jokes*

    Some person: Stop laughing, it's sad to laugh at your pain.

    Me, an orphan: That's the funny part, what am I going to do, tell my parents?

    People: (arguing about stopping orphan jokes since they aren't funny).

    Me: (m e h. i d o n t c a r e)

    My friend in a wheelchair tells a funny joke.

    I resist the urge to say that he should become a stand-up comedian.

    Popular guy in class: I am so funny.

    Me: Your parents are funny as they made a joke and people are still laughing at it.

    What’s the best part about sex with 28-year-olds?

    There are twenty of them.