Fired jokes

Why does fireman wear red suspenders?

To hold his pants up.

There was a school fire. I pushed the wheelchair kid into the fire and said, "Hot wheels!"

Drinking coffee when you're anxious is about as effective as using gasoline to put out a fire, but slurp slurp guess who's an anxious bitch who never learns.

What do you call a gay kid on fire? LGBBQ.

I lit my girlfriend on fire. I guess you could say I ignited her fire.

I saw a kid crying yesterday, so I asked him, "Where are your parents?"

Bad move, I got fired from my job at the Orphanage.

What's black and found on top of the stairs?

Stephen Hawking during a house fire.

I got fired for not doing enough work.

Guess I didn’t put enough backbone into it.

Why did the man get fired from work? Because he took two days off in February.

Did you hear the one about the Polish elevator operator? He was fired because he couldn't learn the route.

Be careful around fire, plastic melts.

What Happens When You Get Caught On Fire?

— You Lost To Slmebody When You Were Playing Hide And Seek, And The Place Where You Got Caught Was Exactly On A Patch Of Fire.

What's Stephen Hawking called on fire?

Hot Wheels :)

I got hired to work as a camp counselor for kids with ADHD, but I got fired. I guess I shouldn't have introduced myself with "Welcome to concentration camp".

People in Africa have earth, fire, air, but never water.

How do rappers stay warm in the winter?

They spit HOT FIRE!

A man said his bars are lit. I said no, because mine are fire.

I set a wheelchair on fire and called it "Hot Wheels."

I got fired from the M&M Factory because I sorted out the W's.

What do you call a kid in a wheelchair on fire?

Hot Wheels.