Fired jokes

Baker

    • I’ll pat your breasts, pat your breasts, cos I’m a baker’s man, and you better bring me an orgasm as fast as you can. I’ll pat you, and prick you, and mark you with my "D", And then throw you in the fire cos you’re now worthless to me!

  • 0

    • Cowboy

    • One day there were these 3 cowboys sitting next to a fire and they were telling each other about their adventures. Well, the first cowboy said, "I tangled with a bull that killed 6 people, so I wrestled that son of a bitch to the ground with my bare hands."

    The second cowboy said, "That's nothing. Yesterday I was walking on a trail and came across a rattler, so I picked it up, bit its head off, and drank all his venom in one gulp."

    The third cowboy remained quiet, stirring the embers of the fire with his penis.

  • 0
    • Fired memes

    Hamster

    • What's the difference between a hamster and a cigarette?

    They're both harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.

  • 5

    • Fire

    • Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a few hours.

    Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

  • 1

    • Job

    • I got a job at a library. I got fired after 15 minutes. They told me it was because I put women's rights in the fiction section.

  • 1

    • Cigarette

    • What do cigarettes and hamsters have in common? They can both be dangerous when you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.

  • 3

    • Karaoke

    • Why can’t anyone sing “hit me with your best shot” at the veterans ball karaoke?

    Because every time she sang the line “fire away,” someone started shooting!