Finance jokes
What do you call a rapper who can't afford jewelry?
"UNBLINGABLE"
I was in the bank one day, and this old lady asked me to check her balance. So I pushed her over.
Do you want drugs? Buy KFC; poor people.
What do your girlfriend and a pool have in common? They both cost a lot of money for the amount of time you’re inside them.
The trip from your eyebrow to your hairline costs $6000.
I am like currency; people always trade me out for someone better.
If I had kept all my two cents to myself, I'd have enough money to publish my own newspaper now.
EU Delegate: "Sir, your country has the highest corruption and crime rate out of any other member nations. What do you have to say?" Ambassador: *tries slipping the delegate 40 Euros* "You didn't see any statistics."
What do you call a rich Chinese man?
Cha-ching!
Q: Why can't the orphan buy Robux?
A: He could not use his mother's credit card.
I quit my job at the bank today. I lost interest.
When a person asked to see her balance at a bank, they pushed him over.
What do you call a rich Chinese person?!? Kaching!
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought a quarterback was a refund.
Daddy, good morning, please, I want too, but Davido's second-hand towel is 2.5 million.
Jack and Jill went up the hill each with a buck and a quarter. Jill came down with $2.50 and Jack came down smiling.
A Scotsman at the hairdresser: "How much is a haircut?"
"Six pounds."
"And shaving?"
"Three pounds."
"Good, then shave my head."
My gun is like my house, used to be full, now it's empty.
What is the richest nut ever? A cash-ooo!
My husband told me he just came into a lot of money.
Weird, he usually uses a sock.