Film jokes
What's an orphan's least favorite film? Family Guy.
A sister told her brother to walk to the store, buy some candy, and watch a movie with her while eating the candy.
But he couldn't walk because he has no legs. He couldn't buy candy because he has no arms. He couldn't watch a movie because he was blind, and he couldn't eat because he has no stomach. Who said he was real?
If you are a girl and your favorite movie as a kid was Mulan, they successfully made a man out of you.
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to fill her car with Vin Diesel.
Chris Hemsworth is Australian, and Thor is from space. Does that make him an Australien?
What is an orphan's most relatable movie?
"Home Alone."
What do iPhones and the Titanic have in common?
There's no Jack!
What do the Titanic and the Sixth Sense have in common?
Icy dead people.
Why is an orphan's favorite movie Spider-Man: No Way Home?
They are making new versions of the Star Wars films. The names have only just come out.
There is Star Wars: Attack of the Trannies, Star Wars: The Trannie Awakens, Star Wars: Rogue Trannie, Star Wars: The LGBTQ Strikes Back, and then there is Star Wars: The Last Straight Man.
What do Spider-Man and orphans have in common?
There’s no way home.
What's the difference between E.T. and an orphan?
E.T. can phone home.
What is Saturn's favorite movie?
Lord of the Rings.
Q: What do you call a Mexican fighting a Catholic priest?
A: Alien vs. Predator.
What's an orphan's second favorite movie?
Home Alone 2.
We see the movie Aladdin, and Abu steals more than Aladdin. I’m surprised that Abu hasn’t gotten killed yet.
Harry Potter is a movie about a grown adult man with an unhealthy obsession with a teenage boy.
"Lord of the Rings" is about a group of white Americans taking nine hours to return jewelry.
Today, I filmed an unboxing video at my friend's funeral.
His parents weren't too happy.
Your mama so fat that when Thanos snapped his finger, it only got rid of weight.