I had problems milking my cow one morning. It was an udder failure.
Why do cows have hooves?
Because they lactose!
MooMooMooMoo
What do you get when you insert human DNA into a goat? Banned from the petting zoo!
Why did the cow smell?
'Cause the horse gave it a pat on the back.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
It didn't.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
I was going to tell you a cow joke...
But it's pasture bed time.
What is it called when a bull lies about other bulls?
Bullying.
What did the cow say when it saw the farmer twice in one day?
"Deja moo!"
What did mama cow say to baby cow? -- "It's pasture bedtime."
One time, a cow saved my life.
It was bovine intervention.
What do you call shaving a crazy sheep? -- Shear madness.
Where do cows go on holiday? -- Moo Zealand.
What do you call a cow who plays an instrument? -- A moosician.
How does a cow become invisible? -- Through camooflage.
Why are theaters popular among cows?
They enjoy watching moovies.
Two horses are standing in a field. "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse," says the first.
"Moo!" says the second.
How do you count cows? -- With a cowculator.
Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens?
All they said was, "Bach, Bach, Bach..."
